PAINAL: I Wont Give Up!

BUT DADDY IT HURTS!

Backpage's finest goes by "daddy's baby anal queen" and she aspires for greatness via her butthole. The only problem is she hates anal and her possibly worm-infested colon is so tight, it's like trying to fit an elephant in a Safeway bag.

Lexi Belle Has A Breakdown

A scene gets a little too intense for Lexi when her costar bitch slaps the valtrex out of her face. After which her costar turned assailant keeps asking her "are you ok?"

Tricking Guys Into Smelling Cunt Slime

Meet "WhitneyWisconsin". She is an attention whore in addition to an actual whore, and thinks that this borderline felonious shit is funny. Check her out before she becomes incarcerated... or self-aware.

Bad Boyfriends 1

The upside to being treated like the exhaust pipe of a Chevrolet El Dorado? Literally nothing. All you have to do is breath and the alpha male fantasy fan fiction will magnetize to you like a herpes outbreak at a Playboi Carti concert.

Anally Destroyed French Milf

Another edition of "anal goes wrong", featuring the perforation of a fuckable milf's blown out colon. The city of love probably hasn't seen this much blood since someone made some cartoons last year.

THAT DIDN'T END WELL

Homo Attempts Straight Porn

Steven Daigle is the gay dude that got kicked off "Big Brother 10" and went on to fucking dudes on video for a job. Except for this scene, where he hilariously has an epic hetero pornstar threesome.

The Truth Behind Girls Gone Wild

[what you know]: Anyone that's had a TV on after 1:00AM between the years 1997 and 2003 are still trying to get this fucking theme song out of their heads. [what you don't know]: Doug "hobgoblin" Stanhope had the approachability of post-nut clarity Clint Howard. I demand a reboot.

Ratchet Sex Tape Fails

Ratchet is what you get if a "ghetto hood rat" and a "chicken head" have a fatherless child that becomes a stripper or aspiring rapper with Tupac quotes for tattoo's and eight ratchet kids of their own.

Gianna PWNS Heckling Hector!

Dont let the bandana fool you. This cholo's 'tough guy' persona is about as real as his pleather jacket. Such is illustrated after Gianna does the unforgivable - an unconsensual snowball attack - which he takes like a total bitch. This is funny as fuck.

How To Fail in Porn [x2+]

A hilarious short story about the prettiest ogre girl from the little village of Mordor... She was looking for her big break but instead she was left with only $250, a butt load of pain and a mouth full of grossness. Me gusta?

Prostitute Lasts Only 28 Seconds

Technically she lasted closer to 10, but this guy isn't very fluent in "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO", so that mahogany-stained browneye got pounded for a few more Missippi's than desired. Emphasis on mahogany-stained .