Girls lie when they say size doesn’t matter. IT DOES. Customize your dream slut and get her ready to take on the BIGGEST dicks the world has ever seen!
Japanese girl destroys both physics & my expectations of all sub-97 lb females at the same time. I officially want to be the first American to lend our "Home of the Brave" slogan out to East Asia. Azumi just earned it.
Intrusion @ 10:05. And whats our guys reaction? Going Wayne & Garth on his ashamed costar. Don't feel too bad as I just beat off to the 8 seconds of your howler monkey mother.
One of few videos left in the wake of the walking disaster known as JewDank. A degenerate adventure filled with drugs, deception and calling out girls that fuck their dogs. Catch up on the full history HERE. Fap again HERE.
Girls that agree to do porn + Refusing to take an ivory shower without a temper tantrum. An interesting combination, backseated only by Burger King's Quad Stacker + Charmin Ultra Soft. Sprinkle in a pinch of sexual anxiety and you got endless fap material my friends.
A window into the lives of e-hookers. Where girls are stripped of their dignity, then subjected to panhandling, humiliation and repeats of Spotify's Top 50. In other words: Better than Tinder.
I bet you $3.50 and the remainder of my orange julius this loathsome creature is a thriving member of the furry community. Also: The one time a video on the Internet isn't fake and this is what you give me? Fuck it, let's contact the guy at the 1:00 mark in this video and get him to one-up the entire thing with a Mazda Miata.
She seems like a nice girl. The type that would throw herself off a post office rooftop if you missed her text, or fuck the mailman's chihuahua if your Instagram pic got 0 likes. But her taste in recreational activities? Shit, I've seen happier faces cleaning toilets at the Renaissance Fair. [SOURCE]
Almost 12 years ago an anonymous internet user asked the world for help, but in a strange twist of fate achieved a status of legendary hero that hasn't been matched since those brief moments on 5/6/7. Nevar Forget.
Admittedly an Internet classic by every definition, so chances are you've already squeezed a hog or 3 to this unfaithful slootanany. But I've never seen this edit before so release the pigs and let's retrojack again for old times sake. Full story HERE Original edit HERE
I don't know what's more impressive: An actual accurate title on a user-uploaded porn site or him going all 9 minutes without asking Yahoo answers where the clitoris is. Back to Runescape, Edwin.
Dare to use your pocket change to encourage these females and you'll usually be rewarded with disappointment. Or more seizures than an epileptic with a fast pass to Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey. REASON: Bitches be fakin. SPOILER: These ones aren't. MORE.
You know at one point in time her dirt tulip at full pucker was still smaller than the cock of an Eskimo in January. I want to know where that footage is. And more importantly, the followup video of John McAfee announcing her as his running mate for 2020?
Did Mark McGrath admit to being a pedophile? Did a feminist bassist fist rape a minor? Why is Eve 6 throwing lunch meat at a hooker? Buffalo Billy? IDFK but I killed 50 bucks for this rare VHS on eBay and I have zero regrets. Shitty Cut versions HERE and HERE.
Let's hope professor JAV is better at making up hacker stories than he is at organizing playlists. 'cause after 30 seconds of this I'm sure it's adios tenure, and hello Alex Jones interview.
Her claim to fame is deplorable... but when the clothes come off her barbarian hips look like they can survive giving birth to Danny Devito and it's fuckin' beautiful. 5/5 Yelp stars, would eat again.
I'm all for refusing to spend the extra $7.00 on a 3 pack of Magnums, but for real: if she doesn't start scouting better company eventually she'll end up on Maury Povich... and then it's "MISSION FAILED" a la Metal Gear Solid.
Hefty LGBTQA+3.14 troglodyke gets last nights Hungry Man dinner ejected out of her after trying to post up on the wrong block. Lesson Learned: When it comes to esophageal tolerance, don't mess with the black people.
Looks like someone crossbred Rosario Dawson with a howler monkey and gave it rabies. But this isn't for the lulz... more about awareness. You honestly don't even need video for this. The soundtrack alone is enough to keep my Bugle Boy cut-offs on the rinse cycle. [Full Scene]
Pigs flying, A Manson Family Hanukkah special & Clean underwear after all-you-can-eat Chinese food. These are all things I expected to see long before a man that has mastered the art of hands-free ejacs. Next time do it into the palm of a guy named Carlos. It's called the Puerto Rican Panhandle, I invented it.
Would Denmark Mafia be so kind as to turn the soundbyte at 0:24 into their next banger? That's the kind of collaboration that can fuel my beat-off sessions all the way into spring. More Woodman HERE and HERE. [SOURCE]
I can't imagine how many family gatherings have been derailed thanks to the conversation that followed wearing one of these beauties to dinner. How the fuck are you supposed to multitask keeping grandma vertical AND explain this? Spoiler alert: You can't. A choice must be made.
![Cum-Haters [2019]](https://cdn.efukt.com/2019/02/9dfe9d2a_efukt-180x120.jpg)
