The Absolute Worst of Pornhub X

I haven't come across so much reason to develop erectile dysfunction on purpose since going down the lore on [this social media creature]. It truly is an unfortunate day to have eyes.

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Why is this Even a Thing?

Reminds me of something my grandpa used to say: Your output is only as good as your input. Not since the the trailer for Terminator Dark Fate have I been so disgusted with women over the age of 40.

06/06/19 Fail

Pornstar Accidently Pukes on Fellow Actress

The pharyngeal reflex AKA laryngeal spasm AKA gag reflex exists to prevent us from dying, but it also makes it much harder to shove dicks down our throats.

07/24/16 EvilAngel Fail

The Most Embarrassing Public Ejaculation Ever

A run of the mill twerking competition is won in an epic land slide when little miss hair extensions makes the guy jizz himself. For her legendary feat Shaquanda is awarded the illustrious title and like fitty bucks.

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The Absolute Worst Of Pornhub XIII

Much like Labubu popularity, one has to question why half of this bullshit even exists in the first place. Emphasis on the 1:20 mark, which somehow still hasn't gotten a Crisco sponsorship . Simply brilliant. [more]

Calling an Audible

Perhaps 'audible' is the wrong word to use here, as it suggests this misfit anticipated the scene going any other possible way. She didn't. Trust me. I've been inside a Walmart parking lot on a Friday night - I know what I'm talking about.

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The Discomfort Zone

You know the deal: It's the height of the pandemic and funds are circling the drain. So you hit up the local videographers and offer your services to the highest bidder. I_CUM_HELLMANS hits up your DM's on Reddit and now the smell never washes off. GG NO RE

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Bro Shits Himself After Knocking Girl Out

panic; pan·ic1; noun; sudden uncontrollable fear or anxiety, often causing wildly unthinking behavior.

04/26/12 Brazzers Fail

FRIEND = INSANE

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The Absolute Worst Of Pornhub XII

A dozen volumes and all we can learn is a two-pack of Coors Light gives the confidence one needs to perform like a deranged circus animal. But today? That education is free. Practice what you see here and I promise them size 14 Bumble girls will never "lmao" at you again. More: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-] [-7-] [-8-] [-9-] [-10-] [-11-]

Going From Bad To Worse

The more this behavior becomes mainstream, the harder it's going to be to come back from. Just ask the portfolios of any person that's posted on r/wallstreetbets. [more here]

The Absolute Worst of Pornhub XI

"they not like us"; It seems to be the mantra on autopilot for half the planet right now. Most semi-coherent adults would never equate the term to needing NASA engineering to put the insides of your asshole back together again. But then 6:52 happens. More: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-] [-7-] [-8-] [-9-] [-10-]

The Caught Compilation 25

It's almost like as time passes, society has less than a fuck to give about where they burn the midnight salami. Reminds me of the time I was almost caught defecating in a Blockbuster return box in protest to late fees accumulated on Surf Ninjas. [my balance remains due]

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