Japanese girl destroys both physics & my expectations of all sub-97 lb females at the same time. I officially want to be the first American to lend our "Home of the Brave" slogan out to East Asia. Azumi just earned it.
One of few videos left in the wake of the walking disaster known as JewDank. A degenerate adventure filled with drugs, deception and calling out girls that fuck their dogs. Catch up on the full history HERE. Fap again HERE.
Hey, no one said you had to like it Natalie Portman. Just lean forward, keep a tight grip on those communal wieners and think about all the Baconators you'll be able to purchase at the end of the week. That's what keeps me going. Her first appearance HERE. [SONG]
Volume #5 in a collection of videos that Charlie Sheen would be ashamed to attach his name to. And without even a single appearance from a graduate of the Woodman School of Rectology, that's saying something. [1, 2, 3, 4]
Girls that agree to do porn + Refusing to take an ivory shower without a temper tantrum. An interesting combination, backseated only by Burger King's Quad Stacker + Charmin Ultra Soft. Sprinkle in a pinch of sexual anxiety and you got endless fap material my friends.
There's just no forgetting you did something like this. Their throats will be forever agaped. The chronic oral queefing has already set in. They're essentially walking, talking whoopie cushions and yet... they remain in good spirits. I like dat in a partner. [Moar HERE] [SONG]
Some will click this and see a beautiful human being. Others will acid bath their routers & set themselves on fire knowing they've achieved less vaginal supremacy than a guy commonly mistaken for memory foam. Choose your own destiny. [FULL SCENE]
Tori Spelling's Guatemalan tit job, the hole in a Walmart bathroom stall and discounted Hamburger Helper on Craigslist: Three things I'd touch before signing up for story time from Rebel "my brain is bigger than my butthole" Lynn ever fucking again. [Full Scene]
Bad judgement and holiday cheer combine forces like John McAffe and discounted hookers. Speaking of the scatmaster himself, he already gave us a gift nobody can top. BUY VERGE. When it's 2018, and you're knee deep in Cambodian cornhole island, remember who got you there. [Santa Baby] [SONG]
Nothing spells H-I-G-H M-A-I-N-T-E-N-A-N-C-E like a lady refusing a gift. TEH FACTS: They'll never look at a 2-Liter the same again, tolerance is non-negotiable and getting them to do a sequel? Well... that's about as likely as Lebron James growing a hairline. More [ HERE ] Song [ HERE ]
Aim for dry ground and let 'er rip. That's been the formula for centuries... until Krystal "i have standards" Steal showed up. You see, she has more apathy for body fluids than Paula Deen has for low fat potato chippies. Ever wonder what it would be like if KFC had an all-you-can-eat buffet? That's the kind of 'sounds fun but always ends bad' disappointment I'm talking about here.
I feel like this has some deeper meaning than a porn parody of the exorcist. I just awed at it like it was a Salvador Dali painting or some shit, trying to figure out how my existence had brought me to this point. [FULL MOVIE]
These awful pornographic gems were all attempted with eroticism as a goal. I.E. People were somehow meant to masturbate to this shit, but what these clips lack in fap value they make up for with lulz. [1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7]
Meet Leya Falcon, the most highly regarded "black cock slut" employed at the prestigious "Dog Fart Studios". She sexually discriminates white men but loves the blacks and affectionately calls them niggers. [More: HERE]