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Shrek

Ouch. Time to cue "dont you wish your girlfriend was hot like me".

09/22/10

Fart Fail - HILARIOUS

This is Scarlett Pain. She's here to show you the after effects of scoffing down a #8 at Del Taco, extra chimichanga sauce. Except this visual demonstration kinda goes to shit towards the end. Quite literally I'm afraid.

08/28/10 Fart Fantasy Fail

Daughter Of The Year 2

Hot ass outtake from in which a pornstar rings her mom as she takes it up the ass. Check out the full DVD to catch a separate outtake of some crazy bitch making small talk with grandma after getting DP'ed. Good stuff.

08/17/10 LULZ

Masculinity Fail

Dude sobs like a little bitch after his sexual advances get shot down by a midol-deficient cam. Cue theme song from Family Matters. No wait, scratch that. I got a much better song in mind. Watch and see.

06/17/10 LULZ

I No Longer Hate Clowns

I was really expecting this chick to have one of those inconspicuous, slit-like vaginas.... not a corned beef gash [as depicted in picture #2]. Still hot as fuck though. She just needs to lay down some Crest Whitening Strips on that labia minora and she be aight. SOURCE: Lexi Belle

06/08/10 Gallery

NO ME GUSTA JIZZUM!

I don't know what's funnier: the fact that a professional cocksmith accidentally blew his load in the middle of a lap dance or the chunky bitch's facial expression after getting blasted with man sauce. Both are most definitely Kodak moments.

My Sister Caught Me Masturbating

Mr. big dick hot shot is reduced to a little bitch in 5 seconds flat after his sister walks in on his cybersex extravaganza.

02/23/10 Busted!

Orgasm Fail

Preggo girl is in the middle of cumming when her [minute] man declares that the apple sauce is en route for early delivery. She replies with a double "doo eet", which I believe means: "cum inside me so that I can finish my orgasm you twig dick motherfucker". The request didn't seem to catch.

12/08/09 Premature

A Hole In One

Fuck. I totally left out the headshot.wav file.

10/17/09 Brazzers Fail

Cumshot Fail

Tojiri "vertigo" Yamamato fumbles at the 3 yard line.

09/26/09 Fail

Shotgun Blast To The Vajayjay

All I can think about is the people who jack off to this shit. I envision a crowd of a thousand Japs in a dimly lit adult theater, simultaneously ejaculating just as the girl's vagina gets blown into oblivion by a point-blank blast from a 12 guage. Enthusiastic high fives, everywhere.

07/07/09 Bizarre

Gigantic Genitalia

I'm about to take a hot shower and fap to my Elton John's Greatest Hits CD. I'll type up a video description a bit later, k?

06/04/09 Asians

Why You Motherfucker

Hottest thing I've seen all day.

04/23/09 Vintage

Mystery Meat

There's been much debate as to whether this is in fact a woman or just a post-op tranny. I feel these detailed photos will help you reach your own conclusions.

02/19/09 Gallery

Girl Gets Publicly Jizzed On

You always gotta be wary of those naked, middle aged men who like to prance about in red face paint. Snapping a few myspace photos with the aforementioned homosexual may seem tempting, but it's important you understand the risks involved. Watch and learn.

01/15/09 Public

Piglet

Ya know that hot 18 year old blonde you had cybersex with last week? This is what she really looks like.

01/03/09

Bosnian Nympho Fucks In A Bar

I should probably visit Bosnia. If girls will drop their panties for dirty old scumbags like that over there, I might still have a shot at losing my virginity afterall.

07/11/08 Public

Hey! Watch Me Fuck!

Look at all those wild spectators... snapping pics for their myspace. I like the one wearing the goggles and dancing with his toy shotgun. He's special.

06/22/08 Public

Hotdog Down A Hallway

There's enough room in there for my penis, your penis and 3 black men's penises. Definitely not my favorite combination but hey, it fits.

05/08/08 Insertions
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