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Earthworm Jim

A parasite most commonly found in dog shit has taken up residence in the cornhole of this Salvadoran hooker. Not much of a step up but what's amazing is how this dumb bitch shits it out in the middle of her pay-per-view camshow without even realizing it. NOE ES BUENO.

2,815,135 views 06/17/10 LULZ

Masculinity Fail

Dude sobs like a little bitch after his sexual advances get shot down by a midol-deficient camwhore. Cue theme song from 7th Heaven. No wait, scratch that. I got a much better song in mind. Watch and see.

1,885,734 views 06/17/10 LULZ

I No Longer Hate Clowns

I was really expecting this chick to have one of those inconspicuous, slit-like vaginas.... not a corned beef gash [as depicted in picture #2]. Still hot as fuck though. She just needs to lay down some Crest Whitening Strips on that labia minora and she be aight. SOURCE: Lexi Belle

3,594,263 views 06/08/10 Gallery

Husband Of The Year

I haven't seen such misogynistic greatness since "He Hates Hookers" with the late Douglas DeMann. I dunno. There's just something infinitely amusing about women being repeatedly verbally degraded by trailer trash king pimps.

3,905,984 views 06/06/10 LULZ

Super Mom

This is ex-pornstar Tiffany Million. She exited the adult industry in 1994 to become a Bounty Hunter in Arizona, which was later turned into a reality TV show. Unlike most of the 2 bit whores in the business, Tiffany actually has some personality. She's funny as fuck and has an upbeat attitude to match, which makes beating off to her videos all the more rewarding.

2,939,747 views 05/17/10 LULZ

The Speechless Slut

Some basic questioning by the cameraman renders this pornstar completely brain dead. So bad she cant even remember how to perform her signature move - a rimjob.

3,042,361 views 05/11/10 Meatholes Fail

Pornstars + Crazy = WIN

There's something truly captivating about the tap dancing, bug eyed bitch at the 20 second mark. Her facial expression just screams "butt rape me till I poo blood." Definitely girlfriend material.

4,344,819 views 05/10/10 Party Hardcore LULZ

Even Jocks Premature Ejaculate

Contrary to his appearance, endurance really isn't this chumps speciality. His load is spent quicker than a black man's paycheck. To call him a minute-man would be a compliment. But all of that's okay when you have big muscles.

3,040,210 views 04/26/10 Premature

A Gangbang Before Marriage

The love of your life just had her brains fucked out by a 1000 different scumbags and now you feel the urge to tie the knot? LOL. Happy honeymoon guy!

4,434,304 views 04/14/10 LULZ

Who Wants Lasagna

First he bulldozes her ass till his cock turns brown. Then he moves up an orifice and gives her twat some chocolate-coated TLC... which is pretty much guaranteed to result in a wicked case of vaginitis but lets not spoil the fun. All things come to an end after he asks the most amazing question ever uttered in a pornographic film - "who wants lasagna?"

3,338,578 views 03/21/10 LULZ

Cornhole Destruction

She screams "ow!" 87 times in the span of 3 minutes. The quality may be crap but you really cant complain with numbers like that.

2,399,503 views 02/22/10 Painal

MOM... FUUUUUUUUU!

This video was submitted with no audio track. Luckly I can read lips with precise accuracy, so I created some textual captions to compensate for the lack of dialogue. Pretty sure I nailed it on the head.

4,190,630 views 02/18/10 Busted!

There Goes My Porn Career

Full video available from BangBros.

3,886,213 views 02/06/10 Bangbros Premature

A Colonoscopy Before Anal

Chester's awfully eager to do some butt fuckin but fears his wanky might come out lookin like a Snickers bar [bitesize of course]. Luckily this Jap has access to cutting edge medical technology - a Feces Detector 3000. Kinda gross, but I find his dedication to 'safe sex' rather admirable.

4,934,641 views 01/01/10 Asians

Stripped, Beaten & Burned

Don't feel too bad... a.) she committed armed robbery and b.) she looks like Bette Midler. Emphasis on factor #2. Read the full story HERE.

3,018,320 views 12/18/09 Gallery

Anal Creampie From Hell

It's crazy. On the outside, assholes all look the same. But if your rectum was to ever head south & emerge as a pink-sock... you'd quickly find that much like the butt plugs in Oprah Winfrey's sextoy collection, they come in all shapes, sizes and colors. 4 years of running a porn site and that's about all I've learned.

1,855,907 views 11/11/09 Prolapse

Quit Fapping & GTFO

I guess he figured that once she laid eyes on his 7 inch yankee doodle, she wouldn't be able to resist and that a 'happy ending' would ensue. The Motel 6 guy actually shared the same ideology. Too much late night Cinemax porn can really fuck with your head these days.

3,550,560 views 10/09/09 Exhibition

The Most Miserable Pornstar Ever

Pretty sure I once saw this chick in a humanitarian commercial for Yugoslavian orphans. It's hard to forget a facial expression like that.... especially after fappin to it for 3 consecutive months.

2,261,368 views 10/07/09 Fail

The Elevator

I decided to reuse the sound bite from yesterday's clip. Who would've thought Robert Deniro's voice could so perfectly complete a video of a man retracting his nut sack to and fro? I know I know, it's amazing.

1,136,488 views 09/30/09 LULZ

Molested At Lunch Time

This is a scene from some stupid French porno called The Image. Stars that old bitch from 101 Dalmations as some sort of empowered cunt that likes to dominate. Kinda funny but not really my cup of tea. I was raised on the notion that degradation is a man's job.

1,801,530 views 09/16/09 Groped
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