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Quit Fapping & GTFO

I guess he figured that once she laid eyes on his 7 inch yankee doodle, she wouldn't be able to resist and that a 'happy ending' would ensue. The Motel 6 guy actually shared the same ideology. Too much late night Cinemax porn can really fuck with your head these days.

3,538,679 views 10/09/09 Exhibition

The Most Miserable Pornstar Ever

Pretty sure I once saw this chick in a humanitarian commercial for Yugoslavian orphans. It's hard to forget a facial expression like that.... especially after fappin to it for 3 consecutive months.

2,253,143 views 10/07/09 Fail

Symmetry Fail

Left one would make for a pretty good punching bag.

613,558 views 10/06/09

Supremacy Fail II

Did someone have a little too much King Cobra?

922,730 views 10/06/09

Cunt Head

Yoshinoya lost his Rolex diamond watch up a hooker's fallopian tubes and sets off on a death defying expedition to recover it. Enjoy!

2,475,440 views 09/30/09 Asians

Healthy Alternatives To Anal Sex

She rather suck off a fuckin golden retriever than take it up the butt. No joke. They even have an in depth conversation about dog cock just prior to the cumshot finale. Nothing like a little steamy dialogue to keep your noodle hard, right?

3,883,575 views 09/22/09 Meatholes Painal

Titty Destruction

If you're among the minority of men that don't enjoy seeing Japanese women being beaten to tears, it's probably best you skip this one. These fun bags take more abuse than a Mexican pinata on May 5th.

2,270,470 views 09/21/09 Asians

Salad Tossing 101

HAHA what the fuck! Just listen to this guy. He lured in his enemy with a blowjob and then shanked him. Fucking new age ninja tactics.

1,494,235 views 09/17/09 LULZ

Molested At Lunch Time

This is a scene from some stupid French porno called The Image. Stars that old bitch from 101 Dalmations as some sort of empowered cunt that likes to dominate. Kinda funny but not really my cup of tea. I was raised on the notion that degradation is a man's job.

1,793,893 views 09/16/09 Groped

Anal With Constipated Girlfriend

I'm always one step ahead of female biology. When I wanna ass fuck a woman, I simply lace her Cinnamon Toast Crunch with ex-lax. Come night fall, her cornhole is as empty as Tara Reid's head. Works every time.

1,813,620 views 09/09/09 LULZ

Orgasm Ruined By Momma

Dudes in the middle of busting a nut when Madea comes a knocking. This is why I jack off with headphones on. Nothing comes between me and glory.

2,322,269 views 09/02/09 Busted!

Pornstar Quits Over Farting Incident

This is a scene from MEATHOLES, which was basically one of the most extreme porn sites on the web back in 2003-ish. It's funny. This girl can handle a fist up her cunt while the cameraman inquires about her childhood, but let one slip in her face and that's where she draws the line.

2,793,704 views 08/19/09 Meatholes Fail

Condom Fail

That's what happens when you buy contraceptives out of vending machines.

2,567,538 views 08/18/09 LULZ

Pornstar Hates Semen

No one said you had to like it baby. Just sit back, open wide and think about all the Baja Chalupas you'll be able to buy as soon as you're done. That's what gets me through the day.

1,520,124 views 08/17/09 Cum Haters

America's Next Top Pornstar

You stuttering, premature ejaculating son of a gun. Peter North and Ron Jeremy are already packing their bags.

1,654,786 views 08/16/09 Premature

Somalis Gone Wild

When you flash your tits in Africa, you don't get beads. Just AIDS.

1,244,689 views 08/12/09

The Sex Offender Strikes Back

Interesting choice in victims. Random hot chicks, disabled senior citizens, and now ambulance drivers. Variety really is the spice of life.

907,459 views 08/12/09 Exhibition

Gangbanged By 251 Men For Nothing

The 90's - A time when fucking a quarter thousand men in the name of art somehow made sense. Talk about a resume booster!

2,645,799 views 08/09/09 LULZ

Husband Forced To Suck Cock

The forced homosexuality thing is the least of his problems. Just take one look at that haircut.

2,957,295 views 08/03/09 Cuckold

Anal Accident Of The Worst Kind

Holy fuck. The bitch spacedocked herself! Congratulations lady, you've made internet history.

2,924,442 views 07/31/09 LULZ
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