The Most Embarrassing Public Ejaculation Ever

Speed Runner Sets a New Record

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How to Get Banned from the Military

Leaking classified information? Mumbling incoherent rants about setting third world countries on fire? Shit, even International Dick Cricket Infestation would have appeared on my list sooner than 1 Tinder gremlin subjecting herself to 31 separate 8-man gangbangs in the fucking barracks. Yet... here we are.

"You deserved it"

Much like Cardi B's popularity, one has to question why this even exists in and how we got here in the first place. Emphasis on the Oscar-award winning method acting seen in the opening dialogue. Simply brilliant.

Tits and Aspergers

A 25 year old boy suffering from both severe autism and chronic virginity has found hope in backpage.com. Will he finally lose his V-card?

Can't Stop the Cumshots

Here it is; A collection of bros that last about as long as I do during a Marvel film released after End Game. Normally these misfits would be thrown into the compost pile and forgotten, but these speedruns need to be seen to be believed.

My Mom's Sex Addiction

Bootstrapping your pretend family members: Apparently it's the stepping stone for every 40-something female that wants to pursue the world of porn. Most women have enough respect to decline the offer, but mom has a different approach...

Pornstars Sexually Destroy Newbz

Watch these little engines that just fucking couldn't get a new hold on reality as God tier pornstars turn their sexual fantasies into humiliating nightmares.

Safety First

Wow, being an attention whore really came back to bite this one in the taint eh? Hey 1Pac, how about next time you stick to overdosing in the laundry aisle like everyone else and save the social media challenges for likeigiveafuck.com.

Public Degeneracy Volume 5

So, this is the new standard for getting attention? Terrorizing unsuspecting civilians with your prescription flavored genitals and "oopsy'ing" ur way through milk toast sexual acts? Points for the self-awareness though. It adds a little depth to my upcoming biography aptly named: Sex, Drugs & Brain Damage

Teacher Of The Millennium

She's junior college educated, has a rack to premature ejaculate for, and isn't afraid to slob on the knob after her partner takes a trip to cornhole city. Superintendent Jackoff & Co can hate all they want, this angel is a keeper. Read the story HERE. See her nastiest videos in the source.

The Pump Master

Meet Scott Taylor. Today Scott is a well respected porn mogul, but that wasn't always the case. Flashback to the glory years of 1985 and witness the Billy Mays of penis pump salesmen.

A LITTLE TOO REAL