For the greater good of porn these basement dwelling wannabe's need the Lassie treatment. These guys thinking they have what it takes to be porn stars makes as much sense as the story line for "Sharknado".
This actually starts off as a painal vid, but much like Cuba Gooding Jr.'s acting career, that only lasts for about 14 seconds. From there on it's all pleasure, and by 'pleasure' I mean nervous system-disabling assgasms so hot even Stephen Hawking would pop wood.
You know what you get when you cast a guy that looks like he still gets the crust cut off his peanut butter and banana sandwiches? Believability mother fucker, that's what. Remove the Bangbros logo and scatter a few Star Wars Amibos in the background and I would have defended it's authenticity until the end of time.
She pretty much aces the whole 'prostitute on camera' thing except for one small detail: This newbie pornstar's lady cum has a really unique... consistency.
Food Reviewers: Some do it because they found a way to monetize gluttony. Others, just want that sweet mcnugget sponsorship. And then there's Bruce. A man with enough F-tier hate fuck material to earn the Gordon Ramsey seal of approval. Feel free to tweet this video out @WENDY'S. I'd like their input on this.
A decade's worth of restrained self-owning content? It happened. From the archives of bang bus'ing to the 360p days of MFC and everything in between; This is the nonsense they wanted shelved until the end of time.
Another edition of "anal goes wrong", featuring the perforation of a fuckable milf's blown out colon. The city of love probably hasn't seen this much blood since someone made some cartoons last year.
"Django the Fifth's Revenge" is the story of a self-proclaimed "black cock slut" on a mission. Notice the highly viscous load of seminal fluid dangle dancing off her chin the whole scene.
For a minute there I was starting to lose faith in degenerate white guy's ability to keep me entertained. Then I was introduced to a fetish with more questions than Sylvester Stallone's medicine cabinet.
Lulz tier verbal diarrhea from the worlds top whores. It's a good thing emotional scars aren't visible on the outside or some these girls would look like Freddy Krueger.
If you thought we were going to make it through 3 volumes of woman decorating their reproductive systems with everything that isn't bolted down at Home Goods, and not get a single appearance by the only pornstar that could land a Dyson sponsorship; you thought wrong. And quite frankly, I'm a little disappointed. Also RIP Rowdy Piper.
From the clearance section of BackPage.com comes an escort sporting bed bugs, a wonky titty, and a heart of gold. Her entire scene is just one giant cluster fuck disaster of fail and it's beautiful.
