HURRY UP and CUM!

The Camwhore Awards

Another year has come and gone, and while it's important to celebrate the birth of my main man Jesus and ring in 2013... lets not forget to pay a much deserved tribute to the hardworking women of the sex trafficking industry. This one's for you, ladies.

Olympic Level Creampie

"Every choice comes with a consequence. Once you make a choice, you must accept responsibility. You cant escape the consequences of your choices, whether you like them or not, no matter how deep the rabbit hole goes." - Roy T. Bennett

OOPS! I Stabbed Your Cervix!

Some "feels" I am glad I will never experience in life. Child birth, menstrual cramps, bamboo fingernail torture, or when a unlubed and unwelcome penis randomly kicks open the door to the house of pain.

The Girlfriend Experience

And by experience, I mean one man blowing up his beer money on the kind of sexual endeavor that would shell shock a Vietnam war veteran. Speaking of blowing up: The only thing missing from that slaughter house between her legs is someone in the background screaming wUrLstAr and Floyd Mayweather coming out of retirement to fight it.

Priceless Escort Experience

Hoe Chi Minh's first time at the fish market goes sour after realizing he should have spent the extra $20 at eros.com before dartboarding the bargain bin. Her defense for smelling like a Portuguese outhouse? LIterally nothing. She carries on like this is part of the girlfriend experience. I fucking laughed.

18 YEAR OLD ASS DEMOLISHED

Awkward Moments In Porn 16

There's a lot to digest here. But nothing is as concerning as whatever rodeo clown, double-wide uncle sister bullshit is going on around the 3:11 mark. Axe body wash isn't going to clean this feeling off me tonight. Time to dip into the disaster emergency kit.

8 Uncomfortable Moments

Consider this an open letter to the content creators out there: I will donate the $13.75 I made trading Krypto Kittys with down syndrome to a charity of your choosing, in exchange for promising to never use condiments on your wiener ever again. The balls are in your courts.

The Real Face of Incest

warning: This is a different kind of disturbing than you're used to. Call it a divergence for this site, but sometimes you have to see the authentic side of something the industry as a whole parodies every day... and this interview proves it. [Full Interview]

Pornhub's Biggest Deviant

That's it man. As far as I'm concerned vegans have officially jumped the plant-based shark. Not even at the height of one of my patented Acid Trip + Red Lobster Biscuit wombo combo benders did I envision something as despicable as this going behind a paywall.

Your Gangbang Etiquette Sucks!

This might eradicate any train-running fantasies you might have once had. But it will also peak your curiosity as to how Danny Glover spends a Saturday night with friends. It's what us Internet folk call a video that's perfectly balanced, as all things should be.

The Absurdity of Japanese Pornography 1

A "last man standing" circle jerk to the death with tranny power rangers from outer space. After decades of being forced to censor genitals, Japanese smut producers have lost their minds.