Losing an 8 inch dildo in in a girls ass can have some consequences beyond fecal flavoring. If you can't get it out, the shoot is over and it's an awkward trip to the hospital with an unhappy porn star.
Every girl should know that a slippery fuck toy plus a cavernous butthole can equal a trip to the ER. Next time save yourself the embarrassing shuffle through the waiting room and tie a string to that mother fucker.
She's junior college educated, has a rack to premature ejaculate for, and isn't afraid to slob on the knob after her partner takes a trip to cornhole city. Superintendent Jackoff & Co can hate all they want, this angel is a keeper. Read the story HERE. See her nastiest videos in the source.
Pretty much the most perplexing acts of genital manipulation I've witnessed since marathoning all 47 volumes of SSBBW Ivy and Friends Videos. My voice matters today more than ever before.
Classic case of overconfidence. If only he put as much effort into his hygiene as she did into Walmart bathrooms she choose to get tattooed in, then maybe this permanent mark on his resume could have been avoided. Live, learn and always wipe twice.
This girl has 1 of the nicest racks I've ever seen. But bundle that with an extremely frigid personality & you then have the biggest disappointment since Macaulay Culkin's The Pagemaster. Seriously, this chick's so uptight she wont even do a facial. It's tragic.
This is all but guaranteed to exterminate any story you've been led to believe that everyone in the webcam community is living life on easy mode. Snap back to reality with 5 disasters even FEMA won't pick up your phone calls for.
goon cave [plural goon caves] [Internet slang] An area or room dedicated to long masturbation sessions ["gooning"], often featuring a multi-monitor setup showing multiple pornographic contents simultaneously. That's what Wikipedia tells you. What it doesn't tell you is some of these level 5 knuckle busting crotch goblins will bulldoze their entire savings account just to "expand their caves". So why are Americans singled out in the title? Because after being assaulted by over 500 photos of these demons, I noticed something; Not 1 Asian, Black, Hispanic or Alaskan Eskimo penis could be identified. Meaning this is yet another one of those spirited hobbies cultivated by the west. Feel free to sandwich it between 40 piece McNuggets and The Kardashians. [SOURCE #1] [SOURCE #2]
Commit to a blind date in the state of Florida, and I'd say you got about a 98% chance of matching up with a person that dispenses more threatening fluids than a Mountain Dew vending machine. And today my friends, you're gonna learn that the hard way.
Nothing quite spells EFUKT like a supposed 'Navy Seal' turned male pornstar challenging 80+ CSUN students to a backyard brawl, whilst completely naked and armed with nothing but a slowly deflating boner. HAHA.
7 samples into a hot dog warming party goes horribly wrong when one rogue cowboy says fuck all to the rules and slings his gentleman juice around like he's in the handicap stall at Country Buffet. The result is a crash course on Plan-B and why IQ tests need to be mandatory in porn. [More Here]
Here it is. Round 2 in what is arguably the most offensive thing you can do in public besides mothershipping the handicap stall at Baskin Robbins. But unlike those shit gremlins - these titans of societal norms actually film the entire thing.
