I dont know whats more fucked up: the fact that he's boning a woman older than jesus or how the enjoyment he gets from it leaves him socially retarded and unable to saying anything more than "AWESOME!". This is what happens when you use Craigslist to get your dick wet you dirty motherfuckers.
Grandpa Willy's sexual escapade is derailed after the Mrs. makes an unexpected visit to his dungeon of spunk. After unleashing a fit of rage, a wild herd of Ukrainian crackwhores appear out of nowhere and make a run for the front door. One doesn't seem to make it. LOL.
She's flat broke, has the body of a malnutritioned Ethiopian and travels via duffle bag. If those arent the quintessential ingredients for a Japanese pornstar, I don't know what is. Now save up some yen and buy a fucking happy meal already.
Stripper fills her colon up to the brim with some cheap booze and takes aim at all the assholes that didn't tip her. I have to say, as an owner of Super Soaker Aqua Blaster 2000, I'm impressed. Bitch knows how to work it.
Dude gets kicked out of a sex club after breaking an unwritten rule against blowing your load on other people's girlfriends. Yep. You can slam fuck her till she screams bloody murder, just dont get any semen on her brah. Shit aint cool.
One in the pink, another in the stink. That was the plan up until Gilligian and his clumsy noodle fucked it all up. You see, his cock fell off course and wandered south, resulting in an unexpected double vadge penetration - a sex move that didn't even exist at the time. Why are the most important discoveries in life always accidental?
A fist fight breaks out just before a mass interracial orgy was set to take place. Dolemite subdues one of the offenders by infiltrating his underpants and obtaining a vice-like grip on the dudes cornhole. Technique courtesy of San Quentin state prison.
When you weigh as much as the couch you're nesting on... performing fellatio is practically considered "exercise". Naturally she's not a fan. What's special though is her mock enthusiasm right at the end. You can literally see calories being burned as she imitates the standard pornstar approach to sucking dick. It's mesmerizing.
One of the shittiest XXX films I've seen in my time... edited down to a cool 60 seconds. It's nothing amazing but fuck... it's got a plot revolving around accusations of sheep rape and worse acting than a Segal flick. How could I not post it?
After straddling a butt plug as thick as a tree trunk, this chicks rectum starts oozing out blood like Owen Wilson's wrists after making another shitty movie.
A parasite most commonly found in dog shit has taken up residence in the cornhole of this Salvadoran hooker. Not much of a step up but what's amazing is how this dumb bitch shits it out in the middle of her pay-per-view camshow without even realizing it. NOE ES BUENO.
Dude sobs like a little bitch after his sexual advances get shot down by a midol-deficient camwhore. Cue theme song from 7th Heaven. No wait, scratch that. I got a much better song in mind. Watch and see.
Want hard proof that Americans are all about charity? Look no further friend. This zesty little 19 year old slut offers a mild mannered vagrant the ultimate handout - a free whiff of her soiled panties. It's generosity like this that warms my heart.
I was really expecting this chick to have one of those inconspicuous, slit-like vaginas.... not a corned beef gash [as depicted in picture #2]. Still hot as fuck though. She just needs to lay down some Crest Whitening Strips on that labia minora and she be aight. SOURCE: Lexi Belle
Hector and his 2.5 inch pop gun (their measurements, not mine) get an earful of criticism after disappointing a gang of size queens... and nailing himself in the forehead with his own payload. Sorry friend but I think it's best you take your cocktail sausage and head on back to that strawberry field you done crawled up out of.
I haven't seen such misogynistic greatness since "He Hates Hookers" with the late Douglas DeMann. I dunno. There's just something infinitely amusing about women being repeatedly verbally degraded by trailer trash king pimps.
As if getting reamed up the ass by a 300 pound tranny isn't bad enough, this gangster fruit gets bonked in the head by random shit falling out the sky. The shrapnel of gay love.
A new era in pick-up artistry is born. This is called the "gimme your number or I will fucking kill you" approach. Fine tuned by the colorful minorities of France.
This is rather odd. I mean the dude gets caught pissing on the face of his 20 year old girlfriend by a lady older than Jesus and doesn't even bother to cover up. For a solid 10 seconds the old hag just stands there eyeing his cock. There's no embarrassment. No dialogue. Just one baffled senior citizen trying to make sense of a contemporary sex act.
