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MOM... FUUUUUUUUU!

This video was submitted with no audio track. Luckly I can read lips with precise accuracy, so I created some textual captions to compensate for the lack of dialogue. Pretty sure I nailed it on the head.

02/18/10 Busted!

Crackwhore Confesses To Incest!

Everytime her son's cock gets brought up, her eyes widen like a fat kid at Taco Bell. It's pretty creepy. Almost as creepy as that basketball-sized tumor hanging from her mid section. Seriously, what the fuck is that?

02/14/10 Hookers

Seduction Fail

This is what your mom does while you're away at school.

01/05/10 LULZ

Hung Like Bart Simpson

Dildo Baggins here could've saved himself a lot of embarrassment if he just stayed home and stuck to beating off to reruns of Captain Planet. Now he and his 4 inch celery stick have ended up on the world wide web for all to see and laugh at. Live and learn brooo.

11/27/09 FuckTeamFive LULZ

Orgasm Ruined By Momma

Dudes in the middle of busting a nut when Madea comes a knocking. This is why I jack off with headphones on. Nothing comes between me and glory.

09/02/09 Busted!

America's Next Top Pornstar

You stuttering, premature ejaculating son of a gun. Peter North and Ron Jeremy are already packing their bags.

08/16/09 Premature

Chuck: The Pussy Slayer

For a moment there, it almost looked as though Chucky was gonna disregard her pleas for a cease-fuck and begin to commence rapage. Mr. Pringles said it best - once you pop you cant stop.

07/28/09 LULZ

Is This Your Son

He's got a 2 inch penis and a hard-on for mommy. Definitely a daily efukt visitor.

07/09/09 LULZ

His Penis Is Bigger Than Yours

He wears eyeliner, listens to Marilyn Manson and has the masculinity of Richard Simmons. Was god drunk off his ass when he decided to bless this tard with a 13 inch cock or what? It should've been me you mothefucker. Meeeee.

06/30/09 Big Dicks

When Senior Citizens Attack

Had me ROFL'ing up until the point that he started bashing her face in like Mike Tyson. That was my cue to bust out the Jergens.

05/22/09 Vintage

Mini Me 2.0

Fuck yes, another person with a penis as small as mine. Welcome to the club brother, refreshments are on the table.

04/18/09

Mommy Where's My Doll

That's the kinda toy kids like to chew on. Uh oh.

04/10/09

Prisoners Of Whore

The storylines on these Japanese pornos are really hard to follow. I vote less plot and more eels.

03/10/09 Asians

A Kodak Moment

Sisters on the left and right. Mommy in the middle. And a white washed Tay Zonday in the back. Lovin it.

03/06/09

Soccer Mom

Whenever she makes the unfortunate decision to reproduce, I bet you the doctors in the delivery room will just have her stand up and let gravity take it's course. The little fucker will fall right out.

03/02/09 Insertions

Stifler's Mom

Improved with age.

02/07/09

Threesome Sabotage

Such betrayal. If you're gonna engage in multi-person hetrosexual love-making, you gotta work as a team.

01/21/09 Bizarre

Your Cock Will Never Be That Big

Luckily I'll never be exposed to such humiliation at the hands of a woman, for in my hometown of Tajikistan it's a criminal offense to mock a man's penis size, punishable by decapitation via serrated butter knife. But that's not to say a woman would ever have any reason to shame my kidney cracker to begin with. Trust me, I put horses to shame.

01/16/09 Amateur

Make Momma Proud

I'm pretty sure just about everyone gets caught having sex by their parents at some point in life. Well maybe not if you're an orphan, but it definitely happened to me. I was playing Tetris, level 34, as the neighborhood hoe performed fellatio on my Ultra Magnus. I put in a special request to mother for some Nachos Bell Grande, assuming I'd be finished prior to delivery. Needless to say my calculations were a bit off.

01/05/09 Busted!
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