Honestly, less than 1% of the shit I post actually makes me LOL. Anal prolapses and horse porn bloopers just don't seem to do it for me anymore. But jesus... the second I heard this guy blow ass in the opening sequence I LOL'd so hard my eyes started watering like an emo kid listening to Dashboard Confessional.
The first thing that came to mind was the chest burster scene from Alien. The second thing that came to mind was the giant worm-like monsters from Tremors. You see where I'm going with this? Put those two together and you have what this woman's asshole looks like. Swear to fuck I saw some teeth.
When your penis just can't get the job done, you gotta resort to other body parts. The fist is the limb of choice for most of those big-pussied sluts, but of course there's always gonna be some with even more demanding needs. In this video the guy uses his foot, but keep in mind you can always skull fuck them too. Just shave your head 1st for the sake of hygiene.
Her vagina looks a lot like a baseball mit, same color too. If you're gonna be 69'ing her with you on bottom, do yourself a favor and bring along a snorkel.
This seems to be one of the rare instances where a woman can orgasm with little or no physical stimulation of the genitals. In this particular case, it looks like the deepthroating and/or gagging is what's triggering her orgasm.
Wrong hole? No not quite. More like wrong fucking direction. His cock nearly pierces through the piece of skin seperating her ass from her pussy. Remember the 'chestburster' scene from Alien? Just watch...
Just close your eyes and listen to the audio. Only time I've heard a man make sounds like that was in Al-Qaeda beheading video. See more from this awesome couple here: 1, 2 and 3.
I have dreams of my penis being that big. I see myself wearing loose fitted short shorts with my wang hanging out the side as I rollerblade by the beach. Jealous men shield their girlfriends eyes as my cock sways back and forth in the wind.
Just imagine if that was an unneutered Golden Retriever... I think wifey would've quickly gained a strong understanding of the term "unwanted threesome".
I found this on some website that pays $2,000 for homemade porno. I'm kinda bummed... they rejected all 3 of my personal sextapes, citing that my 2 inch penis wouldn't appeal to general audiences. Ouch!
A self induced orgasm leaves this slut flopping around like a fish out of water. Reminds me of myself when I lost my virginity, except I actually cried a litte. Tears of joy.
His snaggled toothed girlfriend can barely feel his cock so she keeps asking for it harder but she doesn't seem to realize that there is only so much you can do with 3 inches..
Easy solution: grab the phone & shove it up her twat. With that hole being occupied, you'll have no choice but to relocate your penis to the nearest available orifice - her anus. I call this "How To Get Anal From A Prostitute Without Paying Extra, by eFukt.com".
In the past few months the "how to make a girl cum" video has received over a million views. One of those viewers tested out the technique on his girlfriend and sent us footage of the results. Pretty cool!
No no you're doing it all wrong. You gotta hide the camera in a black t-shirt with the lens poking out through one of the arm holes and be sure to use some black tape to cover up the red LED light. Mom will never notice! hah
This guy propositioned a black man to fuck his wife, hoping to satisfy her desires for a huge cock. The black man gladly agrees but later discovers that fulfilling his role isn't as easy as he had anticipated.
