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Shotgun Blast To The Vajayjay

All I can think about is the people who jack off to this shit. I envision a crowd of a thousand Japs in a dimly lit adult theater, simultaneously ejaculating just as the girl's vagina gets blown into oblivion by a point-blank blast from a 12 guage. Enthusiastic high fives, everywhere.

07/07/09 Bizarre

Gone In 60 Seconds

The title is slightly inaccurate, I just felt like making a reference to that shitty Nick Cage movie. The reality of the situation is that this willy wonka can't even last 5 seconds. Getting to the 1 minute mark would be like an olympic achievement.

05/25/09 Premature

Don't Cum On Me Motherfucker

I wonder what that must feel like... to defend yourself from a physical assault as you're in the middle of ejaculating. I'd sue the bitch - 50k in punitive damages for an orgasm ruined. No one fucks up my fap session and gets away with it for free.

05/08/09 Fail

Cleanup On Orifice Number 1

This is a fetish known as 'cuckold cleanup'. Usually it involves a closet homosexual who gets off on pimpin his wife out to random strangers. Often the husband will sit in the corner and actually videotape as his significant other gets pounded by foreign cock. Once the creampie has been injected, it's like 'all you can eat' night at Red Lobster. Yum yum eat em up.

02/21/09 Cuckold

Stifler's Mom

Improved with age.

02/07/09

Officer Jackoff

He thinks his turn is next.

02/07/09

He Got Game

Turtle from Entourage?

02/07/09

Beverage Holder

Just don't put any cups in your ass and you'll be okay.

02/07/09

Teacher & Student Sextape

All participant are of legal age. Read the full article HERE. I like how the 35 year old teacher squirms like a virgin whenever he sticks his teenage pecker inside her - check both he beginning and the end.

01/31/09 Amateur

Threesome Sabotage

Such betrayal. If you're gonna engage in multi-person hetrosexual love-making, you gotta work as a team.

01/21/09 Bizarre

Girl Gets Publicly Jizzed On

You always gotta be wary of those naked, middle aged men who like to prance about in red face paint. Snapping a few myspace photos with the aforementioned homosexual may seem tempting, but it's important you understand the risks involved. Watch and learn.

01/15/09 Public

2 Inch Penis

Nice trim job! It almost looks half an inch bigger shaved.

01/03/09

The Dumbest Sex Device Ever Built

That doesn't even look too fun. Her tits look like tomatoes on the verge of exploding. I never realized breasts were so durable. Not only do they come in handy for whatever the fuck you'd call this shit, but they also serve as excellent punching bags. They're multipurpose, unlike my penis.

12/28/08 Bizarre

Stuff You Shouldn't Put In Your Ass

Well after seeing last weeks video, I think "glass jars" should top the list of "stuff not to shove up your ass" but honestly there isn't much creativty in that. Now a lemon juicer on the other hand... thats got originality written all over it.

12/15/08 Insertions

Take It Easy On Her Ass

or you just might bust it open, similair to THIS, and dats not berry nice, snarf snarf! (Yes, this is a repost. I got about 2 dozen emails from people wanting to see the full version, which is only like a minute longer but okay here it is!)

11/18/08 Painal

His Dick Wasn't Big Enough

When your penis just can't get the job done, you gotta resort to other body parts. The fist is the limb of choice for most of those big-pussied sluts, but of course there's always gonna be some with even more demanding needs. In this video the guy uses his foot, but keep in mind you can always skull fuck them too. Just shave your head 1st for the sake of hygiene.

11/07/08 Insertions

How To Fuck Like A King

Damn. I could really use some service like this. At 325 pounds, I'm lucky if I can even find my cock, let alone put it to use. Sign me up for 2 whores, along with 4 beefcakes to handle all movement.

11/02/08 LULZ

Senior Citizen Attempts 'Rough Sex'

Anally penetrating a Ukrainian hooker while watching Mrs. Doubtfire has been on my to-do list for ages, but it looks like this crazy motherfucker beat me to it. Oh well, I'll still always be the 1st person ever to receive a blumpkin whilst playing Command & Conquer: Tiberian Dawn. Wasn't easy.

10/12/08 Amateur

Butthole Damaged After Anal Sex

Here's yet another video of a woman suffering from bodily damage after granting a large cock permission to penetrate her brown eye. To be honest, I think this one is a tranny but that's besides the point. I want to know where those 2 giant raisins dangling from her asshole came from?

10/09/08 Painal

Black Cock Causes Bodily Damage

Not quite a prolapse but it might as well be. Her asshole looks a slice of damaged grapefruit and her vagina... hmmm... I'm gonna go with a cut of ahi tuna - burnt on the edges, raw in the center. Updating this site always makes me hungry.

09/20/08 Asians
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