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i aM vErY iNteLLiGeNt

Tori Spelling's Guatemalan tit job, the hole in a Walmart bathroom stall and discounted Hamburger Helper on Craigslist: Three things I'd touch before signing up for story time from Rebel "my brain is bigger than my butthole" Lynn ever fucking again.

01/12/18 James Deen LULZ

Donnie's Feed and Seed

Around the 1:50 mark she denies a handful of the colonel's secret recipe. Uh uh. If that's her idea of cutting back on carbs, I'd love to know how she celebrates Thanksgiving. But the real question is: How many 2-for-1 Golden Corral coupons does it take to make this transaction possible?

12/18/17 Cuckold

Smurf Job

11/22/17 LULZ

Rookie Does A Blowbang

This one taught me two things: A) Breaking points are negotiable and B) Any case studies of being on the spectrum and in porn can now be cancelled. Dorkalina's got us covered.

08/24/17 BlowBangGirls LULZ

Girlfriend Of The Year 2K17

Bridge piercing, stomach tattoos and the occasional rush to the emergency room for soft tissue damage. May I be so bold to say I haven't seen this level of intensity since The Shining.

08/13/17 Amateur

How Pornstars Celebrate Birthdays

Mae Meyers single-handedly vaginally sets up her own BLM movement.

07/10/17 Dogfart LULZ

Hairjob

01/18/17 Fail

Shoe Job

09/23/16 LULZ

The Single Greatest Blowjob of ALL Time

We had to go back, way back and deep into the pornography archives of the 1970's. All those hours of sifting through pale, over exposed bodies and bush was worth it to uncover this beautiful forgotten gem.

09/23/16 Vintage

Loves His Job

08/01/16 LULZ

THE WORST BOOB JOB IN PORNO HISTORY

It's too bad they don't do returns or exchanges, because these tits look like fuckin' grocery bags with cabbages in them. UGH...would totes still smash, but shit them titties fucked up yo!

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