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Hey Watch Me Fuck This Slut

Look at all those wild spectators... snapping pics for their myspace. I like the one wearing the goggles and dancing with his toy shotgun. He's special.

2,165,698 views 06/22/08 Public

One Pump Chump

Technically 3 pumps but who's counting. Anyway I strongly reject the stigma surrounding premature ejaculation. What do you stand to gain by lasting longer? The sooner you're done, the sooner you can go to fridge and eat leftovers. That's what I do.

2,453,339 views 06/14/08 Premature

Pathetic Guy Begs Wife For Sex

WOOPS! Correction: pathetic guy begs wife for permission to jack off while filming her nasty asshole... and even at that she is still reluctant. Buddy, you're better off doing what I do - stroke it to yourself in the mirror.

1,605,392 views 06/14/08 LULZ

How To Become A Pornstar

Careful! Rough sex is now the standard in the adult industry. A lengthy career in porn will cost you a prolapsed rectum, torn vagina and a shitload of STD's. I'd stick to becoming a doctor if I was you.

1,907,747 views 06/06/08 Parody

Kung Fu Slut

Today I leanred that a well placed karate chop to the vaginal section can render your opponent paralyzed, giving you ample opportunity to penetrate her most tender regions.

1,921,474 views 06/05/08 Fights

Extraterrestrial Orgy

I decided to post that last bit of the ET sextape. Elliot is probably fapping to this right now, I know I am. See more alien porn HERE and HERE.

968,662 views 06/04/08 Parody

Unwanted Threesome

When this black guy was propositioned to fuck another mans wife, I don't think he knew that the husband himself planned on joining in. Pay close attention to the black dudes expression at the 30 second mark. He don't look too comfortable!

3,285,626 views 05/29/08 LULZ

Not In My Pooper

Initially she makes it pretty clear that she doesn't want anything in her ass. But our hero Johnny Cock Rocket uses the powers of persuasion and before you know it he's making sweet love to her festering cornhole. Not exactly fap worthy but if you're like me you'll fap anyway.

2,362,469 views 05/27/08 Amateur

Brutal Injury While Making Love

I'd say she was about due for a nose job anyhow.

2,448,759 views 05/22/08 Fail

He Cums In 5 Seconds Flat

His girlfriend doesn't sound too happy about his poor performance between her legs. They have anesthetic creams that work wonders for premature ejaculation. I'd say buy some.

2,334,240 views 05/20/08 Premature

It Wont Go Any Deeper

Alright so last night I was on that Ask Alice site or some shit and it says the average vagina is only 6 inches deep. So I'm dying to know how the fuck does this guy fit a 2 foot balloon in his wifes pussy?

1,507,018 views 05/19/08 Insertions

Heart Attack Orgasm

When I lost my virginity 2 weeks ago my orgasm sounded very similair to this.

1,759,148 views 05/15/08 Orgasms

Kicked While Masturbating

This woman comes up with the genius idea to masturbate under a horse. But the horse isn't cool with that so it kicks her in the back and tells her to GTFO.

3,452,639 views 05/13/08 Fail

Sex With A Cannibal

That's right, this chick flies to Africa and fucks a member of a cannibalistic tribe. Fake? Probably, although those AK-47's look relatively real. The amount of effort the Japanese put into their pornos never fails to amaze me.

3,434,619 views 05/12/08 Asians

Hotdog Down A Hallway

There's enough room in there for my penis, your penis and 3 black men's penises. Definitely not my favorite combination but hey, it fits.

1,440,875 views 05/08/08 Insertions

Porn Slut Is Fed Up

They should use super soakers to deliver the cumshots instead. You could hit a slut right between the eyes from a good 15 feet away.

1,612,504 views 05/05/08 Fail

It Wont Fit

No matter how hard he tries, his cock just wont fit in her ass. Just do what I do, use full force and if you hear a shriek then you know you're in.

2,434,466 views 05/04/08 Amateur

22 Year Old Loses His Virginity

He's 22 and still a virgin so his father put all his pennies together and bought his son a hooker for his birthday... a present weighing in at 200 pounds.

2,099,091 views 05/03/08 Virgins

Bro Your Dick Is Broken

That's a pretty cool magic trick. I would imagine pissing isn't very fun though, probablly soils his pants every time he makes a trip to the bathroom.

1,731,120 views 04/27/08 Bizarre

Orgasm Morphs Woman Into Beast

That man is lucky to be alive. She damn near bit his head off. I'll bet you anything she's related to this lady.

2,018,375 views 04/22/08 Orgasms
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