The Return Of 'Gentle Breakdown' Girl

Remember the frigid chick that randomly started sobbing in the middle of a Rocco shoot? It was actually pretty touching, to both my heart & my penis. But apparently that encounter was only chapter 1 in a saga of piss-poor decisions.

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SHE WAS SHOCKED

10/10/26

Downs with the Sickness

Impressive method acting on his part to be honest. He's got that 'my mother, sister and John Deer push mower are all the same person, so I listen to The Black Eyed Peas on vinyl' look down to a science. Unrelated question: Does gonorrhea cancel itself out if you get it twice? Asking for a friend.

04/08/19 Mildly Retarded

It Finally Happened

I've sat through 8 billion brother fucker storylines, the desecration of an icon and whatever the fuck this is. That being said, it's comforting to know I can still find astonishment in the super weeb fever dream you're about to witness. Good luck.

06/20/22 Hentaied Bizarre

Promises Broken

♫ Lucky for me I'm not like those girls
♫ Who only take it all for granted
♫ All they got is what they're handed

02/03/25 Anal

Awful Moments in Internet Pornography

A public service announcement on the cons and cons of searching for costars in Craigslist's general section. If their intimate relationship with $5 scratch off tickets doesn't erect your cock, the aroma of Newport Menthols probably will.

01/05/23 LULZ

The Bukkake Horror Show

It's hard being a 425 pound pornstar with a cock comparable to that of a newborn Chinchilla. Ay, Carumba!

07/23/13 Putalocura LULZ

The Ole' Switcharoony

She's got a secret. And it's not her immigration status.

08/28/17 LULZ

Imagine Getting Caught Doing This

The soundtrack was so bangin, I had to fulfill your request(s). Wanna know what's not though? Whatever the fuck must have happened to this girl earlier in life to make her like this. Probably haven't seen that kind of wreckage since the great crave crate challenge of '97.

All Holes Are Not Built The Same

Much like the latest iteration in the Silent Hill franchise, we are about to witness colossal amounts of damage that can never be repaired again. More elastic explorations [here]

Fucking A Pornstar FAIL

You're laughing? This 18 year old needs more performance enhancing drugs than Mr. Olympia's gold medalist, and you're laughing?

14 Incher Causes Gianna To Quit

I've never seen Gianna cave before, no matter how big the cock. It's as if her vaginal canal is made of Teflon, with more square footage than James Van Der Beek's forehead. But after watching this, I'm not so sure.

04/10/12 Favorites

Horribly Catchy Musical Pornography

In Russia, a fake farm equipped with disco lights and some thot lip syncing catchy dance music while fucking for 20 minutes is quality porn. I'm not totally convinced, but the song does have a 'pavlov's dog' effect on my boner now.

02/05/15 LULZ
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