Started from the bottom, now we're here. And by here I mean vigorously being tested for sexually transmitted diseases because Dustin from the Target parking lot insisted on not using any form of protection during his big moment. More Blake Blossom here where she apparently streams on Twitch now?
I'm not totally convinced that all these girls have reached stardom. Also, I think Tabitha Stevens now qualifies for senior benefits, and one girl looks homeless, but whatever.
Everybody has a gift. For some, it's convincing solid 4's to double up on their bald headed field mice while simultaneously solving a sudoku. For others, it's knitting. But that last girl? Whoever is writing the next Final Destination movie better start taking some fucking notes.
♫ I got a pocket, got a pocketful of sunshine ♫ I got a love and I know that it's all mine, oh, oh-oh ♫ Do what you want but you're never gonna break me ♫ Sticks and stones are never gonna shake me, oh, oh-oh
The only thing more arousing than a mother renting our her own flesh and blood to the tune of a 2 for 1 BOGO flash sale, is the sequel of a mother renting our her own flesh and blood to the tune of a 2 for 1 BOGO flash sale. I don't know about you but my shrimp roll just got supersized.
Undoubtedly the most erotic thing I've seen since responding to an OKCupid message from a girl named The Violator. Results were similar if you replace 'cumshot' with 'Hellmans Tartar Sauce'. And 'private affair' with 'Burger King during rush hour'.
Most notable is the magician at the :34 second mark aka [Area51Freak] Not a common name you see around these parts. Probably because it sounds like she was knee deep in Runescape quests when she came up with it. And much like OSRS, you don't need a big rig to please her.
If there's one thing that never fails to get me questioning the future of this whole human race experiment; it's what the most unassuming person will consider a sexual accessory. So here's about 6 of them. That's right, six. As in the number of times I replayed the noise that Pringles can made when ricocheting off her head.
Two semesters spent shotgunning Bud Light and using the sink as a toilet? No problemo. Thirty five seconds of experienced squabblenecking? Not a fucking chance. Ladies and gentlegenders - I present to you face of higher education.
The downside to treating your asshole as a source of income? Every time you get done colonizing the dark planet, somebody comes along and insists on outdoing you. I'm talking the kind of miscreant that would mount a Brontosaurus if it meant doubling her OnlyFans subs (4:25 mark). [DISCUSS HERE]
If you think one Dutch girl's journey to turn her rectal cavity into affordable housing is where this type of content ends, you would be right. I wish you were right. And that last clip proves you should have been right. I recommend nothing you're about to witness.
