All I wanna know is how the fuck did he do that without the employee noticing? Some sort of pussy pounding stealth mode... I gotta learn that so I can fuck my hookers without waking up mom and dad.
Today's visuals couldn't get better if you slammed an Ambien cocktail and hit the boardwalk wearing nothing but a smile and Walmart's finest body spray. Speaking of New Jersey, not even [-carl-] himself would be caught $7 dollars deep in whatever spawned in the last clip.
Dog The Bounty Hunter once told me the daywalker is one of, if not the most elusive creature on our planet. Decades of evolution have molded them to be some sort of cockroach/human hybrid. You'd think their survival skills would be S-tier, but all I got out of this was a lower credit score.
The girl is [-Kesha Ortega-]. Well known. Built like a wood chipper. But the dude; He's just a bystander trying his best to appreciate the fine arts when he gets hurled into the role he was born to play. It's cinema really.
Some men need oral stimulation to get off. Others, a $20 shopping spree at Buffalo Wild Wings. And then there's this Vlad the Impaler lookin' mother fucker who needs nothing more than basic silverware to send his himself over the big-O rainbow. Hint: May be better enjoyed while listening to this classic piece.
This is what happens when you allow incels to explore live environments. Safe spaces are invaded, genitals get exposed - all because some guy who thinks Ethereum will be the world's currency couldn't get his weiner wet at the last box social and is now living a revenge fantasy.
Another posse of preoccupied partially sentient protagonists wondering if they could but never questioning if they should. These things would have never happened if they just gave Jeff Goldblum the Oscar.
I proudly present "La Magique Buco Culo" or "The Magic Butt Hole. This feat of pure sphincter talent took years of blood, sweat and tears all culminating to this moment. Captured on webcam and entered into the historical archives for your enjoyment.
Contrary to appearance, leading role in the 2017 cornhole apocalypse was not her specialty. Now that she's retired, you could say her talents were more wasted than season 5 of The Walking Dead. Regrets are temporary. Mike Tyson uppercutting your sphincter in the 3rd round is forever.
Arnost and his 1 inch mosquito bite take a nosedive into humiliation whilst trying to perform in front of a live studio audience. Sorry friendo, but I think it's best you take that CHUD haircut and make your way back to the subreddit you done crawled up out of.
See? Not every post here has to be about unsuitable bodily penetrations and the Montana residents that love them. Sometimes you gotta slow down and appreciate women that would charge $99.99 to drop ship you their fart jars. Ask me how I know.
