Search results for queen of swords

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Fuck The Shit Out Of Me

Ask, and ye shall recieve. I learned that in bible club

2,763,695 views 05/30/09 Orgasms

Gone In 60 Seconds

The title is slightly inaccurate, I just felt like making a reference to that shitty Nick Cage movie. The reality of the situation is that this willy wonka can't even last 5 seconds. Getting to the 1 minute mark would be like an olympic achievement.

1,924,897 views 05/25/09 Premature

When Senior Citizens Attack

Had me ROFL'ing up until the point that he started bashing her face in like Mike Tyson. That was my cue to bust out the Jergens.

1,574,711 views 05/22/09 Vintage

Pornstar Refuses To Do ATM

Sounds like a violation of a contractual agreement if you ask me. See ya on Judge Judy bitch.

1,472,829 views 05/16/09 Fail

Don't Cum On Me Motherfucker

I wonder what that must feel like... to defend yourself from a physical assault as you're in the middle of ejaculating. I'd sue the bitch - 50k in punitive damages for an orgasm ruined. No one fucks up my fap session and gets away with it for free.

2,497,492 views 05/08/09 Fail

Racist Porn From The 70's

Complete with a negro version of quasimoto. Warning in advance to my beloved caucasian viewers, black-on-white racism lies within!

2,300,872 views 05/01/09 Vintage

1 Guy 1 Screwdriver

Poor fella. First his cornhole and now his jimmy jammy. Only one sexual organ left to destroy - el huevos. See ya in another 3 months buddy. Okay now all of you go join the eFukt forum. The dude in these videos posts on there. For realz.

3,495,670 views 04/19/09 Extreme

My Bitch Is Kinky

Some pretty good dialogue in this one. A warm thank you to the creator of these videos for letting me post em, eFukt loves you... and your kinky Harley bitch.

1,107,366 views 04/17/09 LULZ

Help! My Boobs Are Too Big!

She basically paid over $10,000 just to have her titties butchered. What kind of sick, fucked up world is this?

1,973,148 views 04/14/09 Modifications

Grandma Hasn't Fucked In 15 Years

After a cockless decade of lonely nights, Granny is back in action. She's a wee bit senile (The Exorcist comes to mind), but lucky for Billy her pole-riding skills haven't withered quite as badly as the rest of her. She can actually recite your name in a dozen different frequencies as she works the cock. Pretty impressive for a senior citizen.

2,121,381 views 04/09/09 Mildly Retarded

Pornstars Say The Darndest Things

"You don't deserve my cock... you don't even deserve a bulldog's cock. All you deserve is your own stinking shit, so get down and suck it off my prick" .... turn the volume up for this one boys. Waaay up.

2,046,629 views 04/04/09 LULZ

Tunnel Of Love

Put your ear up to it. You can hear the sound of the ocean.

684,638 views 03/24/09

A Vagina Within A Vagina

Double decker taco. Kinda looks like the mouth of the xenomorph from the Alien series. A wee bit nasty but I'd still let her sit on my face.

1,634,594 views 03/24/09 Beef Curtains

Oops! My Asshole Fell Out!

Prolaptic standoff between Falcor and Mr. Spaghettios. I love this shit.

2,112,449 views 03/14/09 Prolapse

Prisoners Of Whore

The storylines on these Japanese pornos are really hard to follow. I vote less plot and more eels.

1,573,160 views 03/10/09 Asians

LOL I Caught You

I caught my ex-girlfriend masturbating once after months of reconnaissance. At first I was all like "HAHA I finally caught you! Yussss!".... but then it occured to me - she rather fuck a piece of plastic than sleep with me. What a fucking insult.

3,874,516 views 02/28/09 Busted!

Butthole Obliteration

If Twitter was popular in 2009, a social media campaign could have made this a serious case for Depends Undergarment's first official sponsor of an amateur porn video. I consider it a lost opportunity really.

1,503,611 views 02/25/09 Painal

Cleanup On Orifice Number 1

This is a fetish known as 'cuckold cleanup'. Usually it involves a closet homosexual who gets off on pimpin his wife out to random strangers. Often the husband will sit in the corner and actually videotape as his significant other gets pounded by foreign cock. Once the creampie has been injected, it's like 'all you can eat' night at Red Lobster. Yum yum eat em up.

1,597,247 views 02/21/09 Cuckold

Let Yo Dick Swang

I wonder how often he accidentally breaks a girls nose doing all that high speed cock slapping? or does that only happen when the bitch stiffs him on his much deserved dollar tip?

1,651,131 views 02/11/09 Strippers

Church Of Goatse

Someone photoshop a prolapse in there for me.

719,797 views 02/10/09
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