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She HATES Blowjobs LOL

When you weigh as much as the couch you're nesting on... performing fellatio is practically considered "exercise". Naturally she's not a fan. What's special though is her mock enthusiasm right at the end. You can literally see calories being burned as she imitates the standard pornstar approach to sucking dick. It's mesmerizing.

06/27/10 LULZ

Drug Mule In Training

Everyone is born with a gift. Hers is a colon that doubles as a footlocker in between flights from Thailand to the good ol' USA. Watch in utter amazement as she demonstrates her maximum storage capacity.

06/22/10 Insertions

Earthworm Jim

A parasite most commonly found in dog shit has taken up residence in the cornhole of this Salvadoran hooker. Not much of a step up but what's amazing is how this dumb bitch shits it out in the middle of her pay-per-view camshow without even realizing it. NOE ES BUENO.

06/17/10 LULZ

Masculinity Fail

Dude sobs like a little bitch after his sexual advances get shot down by a midol-deficient camwhore. Cue theme song from 7th Heaven. No wait, scratch that. I got a much better song in mind. Watch and see.

06/17/10 LULZ

I No Longer Hate Clowns

I was really expecting this chick to have one of those inconspicuous, slit-like vaginas.... not a corned beef gash [as depicted in picture #2]. Still hot as fuck though. She just needs to lay down some Crest Whitening Strips on that labia minora and she be aight. SOURCE: Lexi Belle

06/08/10 Gallery

Husband Of The Year

I haven't seen such misogynistic greatness since "He Hates Hookers" with the late Douglas DeMann. I dunno. There's just something infinitely amusing about women being repeatedly verbally degraded by trailer trash king pimps.

06/06/10 LULZ

Friendly Fire

Dude gets blasted with man chowder after standing in the line of fire like a dumb shit rookie. Even worse, most of the load landed right in his belly button. Gonna have a real fun time cleaning that one out buddy!

05/30/10 Fail

LOL GTFO Grandma

This is rather odd. I mean the dude gets caught pissing on the face of his 20 year old girlfriend by a lady older than Jesus and doesn't even bother to cover up. For a solid 10 seconds the old hag just stands there eyeing his cock. There's no embarrassment. No dialogue. Just one baffled senior citizen trying to make sense of a contemporary sex act.

05/29/10 Busted!

Super Mom

This is ex-pornstar Tiffany Million. She exited the adult industry in 1994 to become a Bounty Hunter in Arizona, which was later turned into a reality TV show. Unlike most of the 2 bit whores in the business, Tiffany actually has some personality. She's funny as fuck and has an upbeat attitude to match, which makes beating off to her videos all the more rewarding.

05/17/10 LULZ

NO ME GUSTA JIZZUM!

I don't know what's funnier: the fact that a professional cocksmith accidentally blew his load in the middle of a lap dance or the chunky bitch's facial expression after getting blasted with man sauce. Both are most definitely Kodak moments.

Meanwhile in Russia...

Dude unwittingly got himself a front row seat to Russia's biggest shit extravaganza.

05/16/10 LULZ

Girl Got HIV After Doing Anal

This is the story of Lara Roxx - a French Canadian who's career as a hardcore pornstar was derailed before it even began. She contracted HIV just after her first shoot - which involved taking 2 fat cocks up the ass simultaneously... aka "double anal"... aka just beggin for a blood transfusion.

05/13/10 Documentary

The Speechless Slut

Some basic questioning by the cameraman renders this pornstar completely brain dead. So bad she cant even remember how to perform her signature move - a rimjob.

05/11/10 Meatholes Fail

Pornstars + Crazy = WIN

There's something truly captivating about the tap dancing, bug eyed bitch at the 20 second mark. Her facial expression just screams "butt rape me till I poo blood." Definitely girlfriend material.

05/10/10 Party Hardcore LULZ

The Craziest Of All Crazy Bitches

Who the fuck refers to stripping butt naked in Grand Central Station as a 'declaration of indviduality'? The same person that dubs themselves a multimedia conceptual performance artist. I believe that's just fancy talk for stupid crackwhore.

05/06/10 Exhibition

Blumpkins Really Do Exist

Male pornstar goes where no male pornstar has gone before: to the bathroom... whilst getting his dick sucked. Sounded like a wet one too. Guess this ends the century-long debate that blumpkins are merely an object of fucked up folklore. Another score for modern civilization.

05/05/10 Fail

Time To Retire

I cant even imagine how many jackoff sessions came to a halt after this saggy-assed dinosaur stepped in front of the camera. How the fuck are you supposed to beat off when 50% of the screen is devoted to the puckering balloon knot of a gay porn veteran? Honestly...

04/25/10 Bizarre

Amazing Horse

A live-action tribute to the greatest song/animation of the decade. Addicting as fuck.

04/18/10 LULZ

The Pencil Test

Ouch. As if being born a ginger wasn't bad enough, this Irish Setter has a set of knockers that look a lot like deflated weather balloons.

04/18/10 LULZ

Do Not Want

A car full of Canadian hooligans armed with a VHS camcorder stumble upon a crackwhore that likes to show off the brown eye. Honestly... for someone that hasn't wiped their ass since 1993, her cornhole surprisingly didn't look all that bad.

04/12/10 Nasty
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