After straddling a butt plug as thick as a tree trunk, this chicks rectum starts oozing out blood like Owen Wilson's wrists after making another shitty movie.
Everyone is born with a gift. Hers is a colon that doubles as a footlocker in between flights from Thailand to the good ol' USA. Watch in utter amazement as she demonstrates her maximum storage capacity.
Hector and his 2.5 inch pop gun (their measurements, not mine) get an earful of criticism after disappointing a gang of size queens... and nailing himself in the forehead with his own payload. Sorry friend but I think it's best you take your cocktail sausage and head on back to that strawberry field you done crawled up out of.
An upclose look at the genitalia of a Brazillian gutterslut directly before and after having an intimate encounter with Jamal Jones Jr the 3rd. The rectal damage is top shelf.
Ashley Blue gets tossed to the ground after flaunting her diseased twat in the wrong girl's face. I'm afraid that canned tuna / Wisconsin aged cheddar aroma just ain't for everyone.
She's in the middle of an all-girl bukkake shoot when her cornhole opens up and gives birth to a raisinette. Not only does this dirty slut pick it up and attempt to hide it, but she then continues to rub her snatch with the same fuckin hand. NICE 1 LADY!
First he bulldozes her ass till his cock turns brown. Then he moves up an orifice and gives her twat some chocolate-coated TLC... which is pretty much guaranteed to result in a wicked case of vaginitis but lets not spoil the fun. All things come to an end after he asks the most amazing question ever uttered in a pornographic film - "who wants lasagna?"
Ginger Spice 2.0 straight up forgot to wipe her ass. She's got a shit-soaked thong that's leaking out malt balls left and right. What's awesome is the dumb motherfucker that decided to use his own finger to inspect the mysterious brown substance. Hepatitis C baby.
No better way to celebrate your last day of singledom by sticking 2 Vienna sausages up the vadge of a $12 whore. They made a push for 3 but the sea donkey insisted her cunt was already at max capacity. Uh huh.
Chester's awfully eager to do some butt fuckin but fears his wanky might come out lookin like a Snickers bar [bitesize of course]. Luckily this Jap has access to cutting edge medical technology - a Feces Detector 3000. Kinda gross, but I find his dedication to 'safe sex' rather admirable.
He's about as good at rapping as I am at convincing fat chicks on Myspace that my semen tastes like Ben & Jerry's cake batter ice cream. Fucking oustanding.
I decided to reuse the sound bite from yesterday's clip. Who would've thought Robert Deniro's voice could so perfectly complete a video of a man retracting his nut sack to and fro? I know I know, it's amazing.
This is a scene from some stupid French porno called The Image. Stars that old bitch from 101 Dalmations as some sort of empowered cunt that likes to dominate. Kinda funny but not really my cup of tea. I was raised on the notion that degradation is a man's job.
For a moment there, it almost looked as though Chucky was gonna disregard her pleas for a cease-fuck and begin to commence rapage. Mr. Pringles said it best - once you pop you cant stop.
