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Hung Like Bart Simpson

Dildo Baggins here could've saved himself a lot of embarrassment if he just stayed home and stuck to beating off to reruns of Captain Planet. Now he and his 4 inch celery stick have ended up on the world wide web for all to see and laugh at. Live and learn brooo.

3,858,065 views 11/27/09 FuckTeamFive LULZ

10 Inches Of Terror

That raspy lookin black bitch's reaction is fuckin PRICELESS!

3,759,305 views 11/24/09 Exhibition

OOPS! Wrong Hole!

I'd be pretty amazed/disappointed if that didn't at least cause a little internal bleeding. Emphasis on disappointed.

5,550,742 views 11/22/09 Wrong Holes

The Sherminator

Props to the ginger on his pipe laying skills. Honestly haven't heard a woman scream that loud since the time I was caught defecating in front of Blockbuster in protest to late fees accumulated on my rental of The Neverending Story 3 (director's cut). Good times.

1,802,537 views 11/20/09 Orgasms

He'll Never Do Porn Again

Failure to achieve erection OR premature ejaculation. Those are the top 2 problems most men face when trying to perform on camera. It's usually one or the other... but in this chumps case - 2 birds are killed with 1 very tiny stone.

3,143,737 views 11/17/09 Premature

Anal Creampie From Hell

It's crazy. On the outside, assholes all look the same. But if your rectum was to ever head south & emerge as a pink-sock... you'd quickly find that much like the butt plugs in Oprah Winfrey's sextoy collection, they come in all shapes, sizes and colors. 4 years of running a porn site and that's about all I've learned.

1,850,637 views 11/11/09 Prolapse

Rough Sex Fail

Some professionmal pipe layers right here. Too bad the only thing they made sore was her ear drums. Skreeem bitch skreeem!

1,882,244 views 11/09/09 LULZ

Bitch! You Broke My Dick!

Fuck porn, she belongs in MMA.

3,759,802 views 11/04/09 Fights

Endurance Fail

I like how he straight up bends his cock as a means to halt the ejaculation. It's a penis, not a fucking garden hose. Nice try though!

2,720,740 views 11/02/09 Bangbros Premature

The Inside Out Girl

Her asshole resembles the neck of a kid that's just been decapitated. Hmmm. Sounds like fap time if you ask me.

2,142,032 views 10/30/09 Prolapse

BEEP BEEP! I've Got A Boner

Beating off at home is for pussies. Real men take their meat to the street.

1,177,268 views 10/25/09 Exhibition

Yo No Quiero Butt Fuck

I posted this awhile back but the clip was ruined by god awful Mexican music. Luckily an alternative version has now surfaced. Less Ricky Martin. More cries of pain.

2,042,993 views 10/20/09 Painal

A Hole In One

Fuck. I totally left out the headshot.wav file. God damn it.

2,839,864 views 10/17/09 Brazzers Fail

Quit Fapping & GTFO

I guess he figured that once she laid eyes on his 7 inch yankee doodle, she wouldn't be able to resist and that a 'happy ending' would ensue. The Motel 6 guy actually shared the same ideology. Too much late night Cinemax porn can really fuck with your head these days.

3,539,383 views 10/09/09 Exhibition

The Most Miserable Pornstar Ever

Pretty sure I once saw this chick in a humanitarian commercial for Yugoslavian orphans. It's hard to forget a facial expression like that.... especially after fappin to it for 3 consecutive months.

2,253,581 views 10/07/09 Fail

Cunt Head

Yoshinoya lost his Rolex diamond watch up a hooker's fallopian tubes and sets off on a death defying expedition to recover it. Enjoy!

2,475,597 views 09/30/09 Asians

Cumshot Fail

Tojiri "vertigo" Yamamato fumbles at the 3 yard line.

1,806,935 views 09/26/09 Fail

Molested At Lunch Time

This is a scene from some stupid French porno called The Image. Stars that old bitch from 101 Dalmations as some sort of empowered cunt that likes to dominate. Kinda funny but not really my cup of tea. I was raised on the notion that degradation is a man's job.

1,794,243 views 09/16/09 Groped

Orgasm Ruined By Momma

Dudes in the middle of busting a nut when Madea comes a knocking. This is why I jack off with headphones on. Nothing comes between me and glory.

2,322,527 views 09/02/09 Busted!

Macho Man Cries From Anal

This is FUCKING HILARIOUS.

1,718,060 views 08/29/09 Painal
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