Guadalupe no, not on the sheets. Those are fucking Egyptian cotton. Now his whole bedroom's gonna stink like chicken of the sea for the next month and half. But maybe you can redeem yourself by clawing at his testicles a little more?
Now this is a most excellent way to tear that thin piece of skin that separates the inside of the vagina from the poop shoot. Puncture that and your lady friend will be the first woman on earth to space dock herself. Wee! Sounds like eFukt material to me. Any volutneers? Click HERE to see a similar video.
Well after seeing last weeks video, I think "glass jars" should top the list of "stuff not to shove up your ass" but honestly there isn't much creativty in that. Now a lemon juicer on the other hand... thats got originality written all over it.
All the things that made amputee porn so great just got shitted on by whoever made this so called 'erotic film'. Amputee porn is about disabled, submissive (and usually defenseless) women being fucked by men with exceedingly large penises. I refuse to have it any other way.
Honestly, less than 1% of the shit I post actually makes me LOL. Anal prolapses and horse porn bloopers just don't seem to do it for me anymore. But man... the second I heard this guy blow ass in the opening sequence I LOL'd so hard my eyes started watering like an emo listening to Dashboard Confessional.
Really now, I've been caught doing worse things on the job. K-Mart, January 2002, thirty minutes before closing, pet food aisle. Me, Mrs. Dilworth and a 2 foot lava lamp straight out of the display case. Use your imagination.
This is from the 1976 classic Water Power. It's a lot like Taxi Driver, except this Travis Bickle has a little fetish for forcing woman into doing enemas at gun point. The film is actually based on real crimes committed by an Illinois man dubbed the "Enema Bandit". Anyway he's dead now, so R.I.P you scat-loving motherfucker.
Fuck, that's a hell of a way to mop a floor. It's inspiring really. So how exactly would one apply this kind of creativity to cleaning up their bathroom? I've got shit stains on my toilet dating back from 1997 and the only way I'm gonna get off my ass and do something about it is if it involves a naked woman.
Here's yet another video of a woman suffering from bodily damage after granting a large cock permission to penetrate her brown eye. To be honest, I think this one is a tranny but that's besides the point. I want to know where those 2 giant raisins dangling from her asshole came from?
A few tit jobs and a little lipo, and then BAM... her vagina will be generating 7 figures annually before you even know it. It'll also be generating a yellowish discharge, depending on the severity of the Herpes and Gonorrhea that she's bound to contract.
You think you've got it good? This dude has a curled mullet and a 7 inch cock that he can suck all on his own. Jealous right? Now before you do that semi backwards somersault, you should really read up on the dangers associated with autofellatio. Wouldn't want you to snap your neck or get some terrible STD.
Not quite a prolapse but it might as well be. Her asshole looks a slice of damaged grapefruit and her vagina... hmmm... I'm gonna go with a cut of ahi tuna - burnt on the edges, raw in the center. Updating this site always makes me hungry.
I love how this is a real procedure. They do it before admitting woman into correction facilities. Imagine having that job, getting paid to raid pussies for contraband. Imagine all the treasures you could find.
I know I know, all I ever do is boast about the greatness of anal sex. But we must not disregard a major downside to packing fudge - and that would be the fact that getting shit all over your cock is inevitable.
She's coked out and on the rag. If that isn't an invitation for AIDS I don't know what is. Luckily sye got kicked off the set before anyone had a chance to stick their dick in festering pussy hole.
This is a repost, except it's twice as long and much better quality. I got a dozen emails from people wanting to see the whole thing, so here it is. Fap away.
Easy solution: grab the phone & shove it up her twat. With that hole being occupied, you'll have no choice but to relocate your penis to the nearest available orifice - her anus. I call this "How To Get Anal From A Prostitute Without Paying Extra, by eFukt.com".
Initially she makes it pretty clear that she doesn't want anything in her ass. But our hero Johnny Cock Rocket uses the powers of persuasion and before you know it he's making sweet love to her festering cornhole. Not exactly fap worthy but if you're like me you'll fap anyway.
