I imagine this is what happens when all of your knowledge of the English language comes from Pizza Hut commercials and TikTok. In fact, I may have just uncovered a form of communication so useless that California colleges might start offering 4-year degrees in it.
Classic cases of unbridled overconfidence. If only these creatures put as much effort into velcroing their crotches shut in public, as they did into experimenting with pain medications: Then maybe these permanent marks on their resumes could have been avoided. Yikes and gadzooks.
I don't know which ANTIFA rally that last girl ditched to shoot this scene, but her hygiene makes about as much sense as the 43,000 volts she pretends are running through her labia every time a guy named Ranjeete slaps down 50 Rupees on her "PubLiC cUmShOWs" ala Chaturbate.
It took 10 years, but we finally have a worthy rival for Tojiro "dribbledick" Akizawa. Technically our American contender lasted longer, but his performance wasn't exactly as well-received lolol
Today's lessons: Little Dicky is a literal name (4:21), Tourism is still alive and well (0:11) and statistically speaking, this is the least likely way to acquire an STD in public. Trust me, I've seen 3 full episodes of House M.D.
It took years, but we finally have another worthy entry for the museum of unintentional rectal breaching. I'm talkin 3.5 nonstop minutes of backdoor bruising that white people should only experience inside the CHAZ zone. Only difference is the people in this video actually put meat inside their bodies lol.
onlyfanz: Some sign up to get a girl through hard times. Others are forced after capitulating an attempt to pay prostitutes in Wendy's coupons. They all start off good, but much like me during Terminator Dark Fate, it only takes 27 seconds to realize you just wasted your money.
I think her first mistake was swiping right inside a Walmart. That kind of risk taking can only translate into one thing: "your 17 inches of combo wieners doesn't phase me, please man up and turn my kidneys into a box of Idaho spud's classic mashed potatoes". Invitation accepted.
Homing in on the 10-clip anniversary of offensive sexual acts among a global pandemic, and yet I remain hopeful. I mean hopeful that people in quarantine will continue to produce more reprehensible content than a Harvey Weinstein video library, not the Covid stuff - we're fucked. Like the guy in the first clip: Fap until it goes dark.
It's that time of year again. When degenerate girls jacked to the tits in daddy issues insist on doing it for tha gram but end up frail, fucked and forgotten. Not since the days of blindly acquiring porn ala 5600 baud Limewire have I come across a female with such anti-seminal fortitude.
First time I've seen a wife rental video where the girl and her hired gun are left more humiliated than the husband. 7 1/2 inches of New Orlean's finest essentially left them completely mute, save for some sobbing that is usually reserved for the customer service desk at Lululemon. Hilarious.
That's it man. As far as I'm concerned vegans have officially jumped the plant-based shark. Not even at the height of one of my patented Acid Trip + Red Lobster Biscuit wombo combo benders did I envision something as despicable as this going behind a paywall.
It's been 14 years of Efukt, so trust me when I say I know talent when I see it. Meet siswet. A girl that has cultivated a million Chaturbate followers by using her asshole to inhale anything without a birth certificate. I'm talking the Kirby of butt stuff and there's no fucking end in sight.
Here it is. Round 2 in what is arguably the most offensive thing you can do in public besides mothershipping the handicap stall at Baskin Robbins. But unlike those shit gremlins - these titans of societal norms actually film the entire thing.
Guys coming up short, Increasing Japan's tourism, Why not to go organic, Offending white college students and Incredible acts of self-reliance. This compilation covers more bases than Harvey Weinstein during a 3-day trip to the Bahamas.
A special "BRUH" moment for clip #4. I honestly haven't seen a woman that concerned since I test ran the floor units in Home Depot's toilet bowl section after White Castle started selling their burgers by the hundreds. Let's just say I'm not allowed to improve my house again until 2027. TAKE IT AWAY CORPSEGRINDER.
Here it is: The grand finale in a long line of degenerates who value their integrity less than that chicken sandwich everyone is getting german suplexed over. Especially the last clip. I haven't seen determination like that since the Epstein Didn't Kill Himself meme.
My tenure in pornography has made witness to a lot of hopeless girls doing a lot of hopeless shit just to keep their Tampax bills paid. But essentially giving your fellow camstitutes the green light to cry their way to Efukt superstardom? That's a level of loyalty I didn't even know I wanted.
Consider this the advanced users only section of the Internet. And nothing spells T-A-C-T-I-C-A-L A-D-V-A-N-T-A-G-E quite like a woman that could literally use a Volkswagen Golf as a dildo. If you're not into safe spaces being invaded... this one isn't for you.
