He's about as good at rapping as I am at convincing fat chicks on Myspace that my semen tastes like Ben & Jerry's cake batter ice cream. Fucking oustanding.
Neat trick but I'm afraid I lack the penis for the job. No worries though, that's where the GHB comes into play. It's all about equal opportunity fellas.
I'll give you a hint - it's a vegetable that shares it's name with an incredibly shitty nu metal band whose fans always wear black nail polish and amazingly have smaller penises than myself (sub 3.75 inches). This is too easy.
I wonder how often he accidentally breaks a girls nose doing all that high speed cock slapping? or does that only happen when the bitch stiffs him on his much deserved dollar tip?
Luckily I'll never be exposed to such humiliation at the hands of a woman, for in my hometown of Tajikistan it's a criminal offense to mock a man's penis size, punishable by decapitation via serrated butter knife. But that's not to say a woman would ever have any reason to shame my kidney cracker to begin with. Trust me, I put horses to shame.
This dude screams as if his hand just got hacked off Blood Diamond style. And sorry if this is a repost, I'm short on time. I've got a date with an 19 year old diabetic in 45 minutes. We're gonna watch Jumanji and play truth or dare at my moms house. Jealous?
I like his Chuck Norris style somersault but I have mixed feelings about the use of chocolate syrup. Sure it'll easily mask the bitter taste of her cornhole but in the end how's he gonna be able to differienate syrup from shit? It's a dangerous game that salad tossing is.
Cocks like this ought to be illegal, punishable by castration. Anything above 13 inches has got to go. They'll poke your eye out, prolapse your ass and leave with you a cocktail of STD's.
Not quite a prolapse but it might as well be. Her asshole looks a slice of damaged grapefruit and her vagina... hmmm... I'm gonna go with a cut of ahi tuna - burnt on the edges, raw in the center. Updating this site always makes me hungry.
He's got me beat by like one inch. Okay maybe more like 23 inches. I couldn't even satisfy a midget. But where I lack in size, I make up for with class and charm.
This guy propositioned a black man to fuck his wife, hoping to satisfy her desires for a huge cock. The black man gladly agrees but later discovers that fulfilling his role isn't as easy as he had anticipated.
