Prostitute Lasts Only 28 Seconds

6,107,639 views

Technically she lasted closer to 10, but this guy isn't very fluent in "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO", so that mahogany-stained browneye got pounded for a few more Missippi's than desired. Emphasis on mahogany-stained .

Uploaded 04/06/13 Painal

You know the deal: It's the height of the pandemic and funds are circling the drain. So you hit up the local videographers and offer your services to the highest bidder. I_CUM_HELLMANS hits up your DM's on Reddit and now the smell never washes off. GG NO RE

2,291,517 views 08/02/21 HeavyOnHotties Fail

The Desperate Doctor

My gut instinct tells me the era of slasher movies is dead when the practical effects guys start taking on jobs like this. The Friday the 13th reboot was bad. Cult of Chucky sucked. The new Halloween might work... but nothing can prepare you for this alternate ending to Fire in the Sky.

1,934,828 views 07/02/18 Horror Porn Bizarre

Just Japanese Things

An all-minority female cast ultimately leading to me losing faith in life itself? You can go ahead and file this under The 2016 Ghostbusters Reboot of Porn. And Bill Murray can't save you this time.

1,576,011 views 02/29/20 JAVHD Asians

Cursed Cumshots

Is this still considered pornography? Or something that gets submitted to a performative art school as a final project? Because if you're waxin carrot to shit like this, it ~~might be~~ is definitely time for intervention.

1,117,653 views 10/09/23 Orgasms

The Caught Compilation 1

This piece highlights some cases of shoulda locked the fucking door but I'm thinking with my genitals and other hilarious cases of people getting busted.

10,686,359 views 02/14/15 Caught Compilations

The Absurdity of Japanese Pornography 3

More insanity from the porno-terrorists known as the Japanese. Screen caps and shitty clips of this have floated around the net for years but I finally got a full HD copy.

2,636,413 views 07/08/14 JAVHD The Absurdity of Japanese Pornography

Lana Rhoade's Biggest Regret

Contrary to appearance, leading role in the 2017 cornhole apocalypse was not her specialty. Now that she's retired, you could say her talents were more wasted than season 5 of The Walking Dead. Regrets are temporary. Mike Tyson uppercutting your sphincter in the 3rd round is forever.

1,738,540 views 07/05/21 Painal

America's Real Crisis

This is what happens when Tinder gets boring and a woman experiments outside of her comfort zone. That fucking thing is one "let met talk to your manager haircut" away from being Brie Larson's stunt double. Or Tim Burton's next villain. Feel free to choose your own adventure today.

2,257,549 views 05/03/19 Argentina Naked Painal

Cumming on Strangers

Meet Melody: A 33% shareholder in the trio of Italian incest freaks known as DollsCult. Apparently in between marathoning episodes of Metaloclypse and getting death threats for wiping their genitals all over public property - they actively participate in community service. #getamop

1,852,173 views 09/25/20 Teen

A Different Kind of Painal

Jackass-inspired stunt involving a weapons-grade slingshot and some cactus goes horribly right when the target, (a gypsy woman's anus), is met with a direct hit. And now I'm met with a direct boner. Circle of life.

5,457,073 views 05/29/13 Favorites

Bad Boyfriends 1

The upside to being treated like the exhaust pipe of a Chevrolet El Dorado? Literally nothing. All you have to do is breath and the alpha male fantasy fan fiction will magnetize to you like a herpes outbreak at a Playboi Carti concert.

2,747,764 views 03/21/22 Bad Boyfriends