Lonely Arab REALLY Wants Free Head

2,300,955 views

Working the graveyard shift usually sucks Golden Retriever dick, but it's not entirely absent of perks. During my tenure at the 24 hour Rite Aid, I enjoyed a 10% increase in pay and unadulterated access to the ice cream station. But as for complimentary blowjobs from tresspassing prostitutes... that one's all up to this smooth talking Apu.

Uploaded 02/19/12 LULZ

Hey, no one said you had to like it Natalie Portman. Just lean forward, keep a tight grip on those communal wieners and think about all the Baconators you'll be able to purchase at the end of the week. That's what keeps me going. Her first appearance HERE.

2,128,486 views 03/21/19 Porta Gloryhole LULZ

Finga La Pinga

Hank Hill, I think your problems have been solved.

1,007,435 views 05/19/22 Bizarre

The Internet Never Forgets

Outside of ejaculating to Nicolas Cage's death scene in The Wicker Man, no male celebrity will bring you remorse quite like Simon 'Dirt Nasty' Rex. Former MTV VJ, rolls with Andy Milonakis... and 20 years ago he took a $100 payday to stick his dick in Zack Morris' bedroom carpet. [Diss Track by Traplord Skybaby]

2,398,350 views 08/12/18 LULZ

The Biggest Cuck on Earth Part 2

[MAKE SURE YOU WATCH PART 1 FIRST] Here it is. A live demonstration of what may be the very first evidence that sexually transmitted diseases are a conspiracy. Freddie Mercury: I'm going to get you the justice you deserve.

1,055,210 views 08/20/20 Cuckold

Desperate Times, Desperate Measures

"We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give." - Winston Churchill

770,399 views 01/27/22 LULZ

LET ME BANG, BRO!

One determined woman's mission to have her guts turned into a holiday display at Home Goods is actually thwarted by a director that specializes in mawmaw's chicken casserole. She wants to continue, he makes her hit the showers... and a new dynamic in butthole malfeasance porn is born.

1,510,075 views 12/29/22 Anal

When Cheaters Win

Say hello to your new role model. His half-cocked baguette has seen more trauma than a Chicago emergency room, yet he's able to completely 180 the loyalty of one of the most bangin girls on the planet. Guess that old saying is true: Don't judge a book until it's deposited $250 into your bank account.

2,056,129 views 09/09/21 Woodman Casting X Busted!

The Regret is REAL

From stone cold fox, to Stone Cold Steve Austin. #fap

3,024,821 views 09/18/18 LULZ

THAT DIDN'T END WELL

14,936 views 05/16/24

Sexual Socialism

What's mine is yours. And what's yours makes her think walking away from that 4-year degree in Anthropological Gender Studies of Amazonian Tree Frogs to do this instead was a bad idea.

1,889,775 views 08/05/19 LULZ

BiG Bertha's Pocket Rocket

The name "Big Bertha" comes from a giant Pre-Nazi German war cannon that would lob 1,800 lb explosive shells into shit like France and Belgium. It also happens to look like this bitches dick.

1,886,193 views 02/23/16 Futanaria Bizarre

Jack the Ripper

Some men need oral stimulation to get off. Others, a $20 shopping spree at Buffalo Wild Wings. And then there's this Vlad the Impaler lookin' mother fucker who needs nothing more than basic silverware to send his himself over the big-O rainbow. Hint: May be better enjoyed while listening to this classic piece.

1,220,170 views 03/12/19 Extreme