Hey Daddy, look what I can do!

Breaking Points

For some of us, it's authoritarian governments. Others, the refusal to make the McRib a permanent menu item. And there's these 5 sacrificial lambs. Who almost made it to the finish line with guys who consider Brazilian jiu-jitsu a sexual fetish.

Return of the Dumbest Cunt in Porn

This one is for the homies that asked me wtf happened to that girl who looks like Sarah Palin crossbreed her with a gerbil? As fate would have it, not even a pandemic slowed down her quest for hating cum on a budget. Yikes and might I add, gadzooks.

The Desperate Doctor

My gut instinct tells me the era of slasher movies is dead when the practical effects guys start taking on jobs like this. The Friday the 13th reboot was bad. Cult of Chucky sucked. The new Halloween might work... but nothing can prepare you for this alternate ending to Fire in the Sky.

Awkward Moments in Porn 12

Today we're rounding third on a baker's dozens worth of boner-deflating cringe collections so bleak, you'll wonder what the point of sexual intercourse even is anymore. Just load up one of those Choose Your Own Adventure Hentai VR fantasies, and fuck the Hamtaros out of a face-swapped Charizard until you feel alive again.

Hilarious Oral Sex Fail

College level alcoholism and risk seeking behavior has led them to a ratchet motel, wasted off vodka red bulls and making a quick $100 each. Shouldn't be any surprise that these girls never did porn again.

Masturbating Behind Mom's Back

Looks like being a teenage cam girl is rough these days. Stuck living at home, she has to pull off stealthy ninja faps and even do her cam whoring literally right next to her unsuspecting mother.

CAMTASTROPHES #2

You don't have to be a tier-3 to experience this kind of homemade hysteria. Just zero in on the girls that are sexually attracted to Amibos and the yoinked "donations" will flow in faster than you can complain about them on Twitter. [Part I]

18-Year-Olds are Complicated

This example of why you should periodically review your fiber intake, goes by the name Baby Swabery. Due to her age, I'll be approaching this description accordingly: no cap the jumbo deluxe chimmichanga lunch special was a mf mistake, fr the situation is NOT bussin.

Porn Scenes Worthy of an Oscar 5

Volume #5 in a collection of videos that Charlie Sheen would be ashamed to attach his name to. And without even a single appearance from a graduate of the Woodman School of Rectology, that's saying something.

THIS WON'T LAST 24HRS

Deaf Azn Girl

Meet Kim, the bombshell Azn who can't hear shit. Our genius porn hero guy figures to write down "me want fukky fukky" on paper and away we go. She only makes little soft vowel noises, it's pretty adorable.

Porn's Biggest Losers

Little engines that just fucking couldn't. If there was a "Special Olympics" for sexual performance, these guys would still be the underdogs of the league. The other retards would prolly bully them.