Never Happens At My Hardware Store

Never Happens At My Hardware Store

Uploaded 10/24/18
Related Videos

The Only Olympics I'm Watching in 2024

I wasn't intending on the ambiguous crossover of Tokyo and The Kentucky Derby to make my boner list... yet here we are.

02/23/23 Asians

Butt Plug Kite Flying

Another historical moment that will make you question inter-metropolitan leisure, or reason #274 trailer parks will never receive subsidized housing? I don't know, but Benjamin Franklin didn't die for this.

08/13/26 LULZ

Safe Sex FAIL

Gloryhole rookie "Emma" unequivocally accepts defeat after Stewart's Magnum XL ventures into deeper waters. In other words: The flex went wrong HAHA

Incredible Acts, Depraved Humans 8

It may not be explicitly written in the rule book, but there's only one translation for the body language on the girl going Milli Vanilli on herself. And it exists somewhere in between "Car Batteries Are Not Sex Toys" and "Oops My Asshole Fell Out".

REAL CHEATING

10/10/26

Olympic Level Creampie

"Every choice comes with a consequence. Once you make a choice, you must accept responsibility. You cant escape the consequences of your choices, whether you like them or not, no matter how deep the rabbit hole goes." - Roy T. Bennett

Cum Haters 2020

It's that time of year again. When degenerate girls jacked to the tits in daddy issues insist on doing it for tha gram but end up frail, fucked and forgotten. Not since the days of blindly acquiring porn ala 5600 baud Limewire have I come across a female with such anti-seminal fortitude.

03/13/20 Orgasms

Two Reichs Make A Wrong

Here it is. Three minutes of the 2nd most apprehensive plot lines that can escape the human brain during a spirited round of Billy Blanks Tae Bo 3-Pack DVD and resistance bands combo set on sale now at Amazon for Black Friday. Use promo code: BERGHOF

11/18/24 Crazy

New Year, New Me

You know at one point in time her dirt tulip at full pucker was still smaller than the cock of an Eskimo in January. I want to know where that footage is. And more importantly, the followup video of John McAfee announcing her as his running mate for 2020?

01/01/19 Bizarre

Awkward Moments In Porn 3

If you haven't already, check out the rest of the series and then come back. We're going to meet a girl who has never blowjob'd before, plus a man who has a breakdown. While fucking a cake. So go get your little sister 'cause it's gonna be a really swag time.

Incel Uprising at the Maid Cafe

Don't let the Twitch staff wardrobe and lack of muscle fiber fool you: This army of limp-wristed, mouth-breathing fun-seekers have reached their breaking point and shit just hit the fan water-cooled RTX 3080. Consider this a warning to all women that can fit in a rowboat.

01/25/21 JAVHD Asians

The Absurdity of Japanese Pornography

A "last man standing" circle jerk to the death. After decades of being forced to censor genitals, Japanese smut producers have lost their minds.

11/14/13 JAVHD Asians
Type ? for random video