It's only 10 minutes into the all night sex party and this douche is about to bust his nut after a 30 second blowjob. Not wanting to end the night early, he awkwardly death grips his penis attempting to cease climax.
Nearly a dozen self-proclaimed slam masters add another accolade to their resumes in the form of EFUKT FEATURES. Emphasis on the final clip, in what will surely be the biggest "can surgery fix this?" clip you'll see today. MORE: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-]
No, seriously don't. Every once in a while pornography life overlaps into real life lessons. Let's just be glad this learning experience was made possible without the assistance of Czechoslovakian accents, and a petting zoo.
You don't have to be a full blown beta to experience this level of salami sloshing. Just find a girl that's sexually attracted to Amibos & the lifetime bans from all major entertainment venues will flow in faster than you can complain about them on Twitter. We may be at the point where the rise of this fetish needs clinical studying.
Meet the man whose penis looks more like a belly button with testicles. The man who gives credence to the old adage of "it's just cold outside", in response to why ones cock would be smaller than a vienna sausage.
Noob's first and final attempt at porn stardom lands him in a gang bang shoot. He doesn't care, he thinks he's ready for anything... but nothing can prepare you to be a premature ejaculator's innocent bystander. PEW PEW
At this point I'm just respecting the hustle of being able to sell sex without ever being penetrated in front of a camera. Truly a spectacle in it's own right that leaves you trapped between vigorous masturbation or making a donation to the Shia LaBeouf Community College for the Gifted. [PART I] [PART II] [PART III]
I'm sure an UBER to a trailer park and at least a handful of 4LOKOs are responsible for the creation of the majority of these situations. But, screw it; Even speedrunslive is jealous of these personal bests. MORE: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-] [-7-] [-8-]
The girl is [-Kesha Ortega-]. Well known. Built like a wood chipper. But the dude; He's just a bystander trying his best to appreciate the fine arts when he gets hurled into the role he was born to play. It's cinema really.
This guy's dream came true and the bang bus picked him up. First, he's gonna make out with a professional cock sucker. Then after a whopping 10 seconds inside a vagina, he's totally gonna cum all over himself.
Here it is; A collection of bros that last about as long as I do during a Marvel film released after End Game. Normally these misfits would be thrown into the compost pile and forgotten, but these speedruns need to be seen to be believed.
This girl is ridiculously cute. I want to hold her hand. I want to smell her hair. I want a 3x5 inch cut-out of the computer chair fabric that was blessed with her vaginal discharge. Until then, this gem will have to do.