Two semesters spent shotgunning Bud Light and using the sink as a toilet? No problemo. Thirty five seconds of experienced squabblenecking? Not a fucking chance. Ladies and gentlegenders - I present to you face of higher education.
Nothing says "the pandemic is over" quite like the uptick in girls increasing their social skank rank by taking their 1-man-band act on the road. Nearly 13 displays of attention-whoring so unprecedented, you'll schedule an STD test just for watching it.
Tori Spelling's Guatemalan tit job, the hole in a Walmart bathroom stall and discounted Hamburger Helper on Craigslist: Three things I'd touch before signing up for story time from Rebel "my brain is bigger than my butthole" Lynn ever fucking again.
I haven't seen urban dominance like this since witnessing an uneducated citizen cut in line during the illustrious Popeye's chicken sandwich craze of 2019. MORE: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-]
I'll leave you with some wisdom my acquaintance at Panda Express bestowed upon me: Never underestimate a woman's will to feed. She may have the phenotype of a New Jersey soccer mom... but when the adrenaline hits, watch the fuck out.
Brain damage, simping epidemic, mental patient that smells like mashed potatoes: You degenerates can label this video with whatever tags you want. Nothing can stop true romance.
I've seen a lot of people do a lot of repulsive shit just to keep their rent paid. But whatever backyard bangcock bumblefuck blownout butthole bullshit is going on in the last clip? That's a level of holistic hemorrhoidal care I hope to never see IRL. Discuss your disgust [-HERE-]
idk what these goofballs were thinking when they decided going public with these acts of treason was a good idea. Something about the return on investment seems a little fucky. Possibly a decision sponsored and brought to you by [Prime™] Energy drinks. [PART 1]
Yeah uh... so is this what studio porn has evolved into? Because if I've lived to the point where people are actually spending money on producing cleverly disguised Cialis commercials we may have finally reached the bottom...
I'm sure an UBER to a trailer park and at least a handful of 4LOKOs are responsible for the creation of the majority of these situations. But, screw it; Even speedrunslive is jealous of these personal bests. MORE: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-] [-7-] [-8-]
Not since ejaculating to Samuel L Jackson's death scene in Deep Blue Sea have I felt this much cinematographic remorse. They just let his wonder worm flap around without even an attempt at Photoshop. Five more leading roles like this and she'll be ready for Paul Anderson.