A heart warming moment when a pretty camgirl who happens to sound like MadTV's Stuart, drops jaw and flips her shit when she unexpectedly squirts for the first time in her life.
What's that old saying again? If a mint condition cornhole exists, Pierre Woodman will abuse it more than a penalty shot kicker from England? Unlike Snaggletooth McButtfuck over here, those three lads can sit down on a hard surface for the next month without consequence.
I don't know why anyone would post such things of themselves onto such a terrible place as the internet, but whatever! Come ride the shit train with me on a journey into the awful side of amateur pornography.
99.99% of men will never experience this man's life. He's got the negotiating skills of Elon Musk, the aura of a baconator and they've got no other options. It's a sexual combination you never knew you wanted until today.
So this is what happens when Chaturbate gets saturated with day-ones and you have to find creative ways to scalp juicer tokens. All because a rickshaw driver from Tanzania can't stop maxing out his data plan so he can tell azngirl8537 to "show anal and borbs".
Paying someone on the internet to watch you jerk off on webcam seems pathetic and sad overall, but this one has to hold back laughing when she see's this fuckin guys dick.
We as humans are at the fuckin' highest point of civilization we've ever achieved. Our technology is more advanced than ever before in history and recently, we put a dildo in orbit... Welcome to the new age.
Let me tell you something people. I've been doing this a long time, maybe even longer then some of you have been alive. And I can honestly say this is the first time I feared a studio would be sued by George Lucas for infringing on his design for the Sarlacc. For the love of fuck, prepare yourself.
You know what you get when you cast a guy that looks like he still gets the crust cut off his peanut butter and banana sandwiches? Believability mother fucker, that's what. Remove the Bangbros logo and scatter a few Star Wars Amibos in the background and I would have defended it's authenticity until the end of time.
To all 19 active female viewers of this site: Break out the newtons and take some notes. This is what you DON'T DO to avoid becoming official Efukt alumni.
