I FUCKING HATE CUM!

2,721,945 views
Uploaded Oct 2, 2013

Marvel in the majestic awe of unwanted facials, oral insemination's from men lacking fruit in their diet and other tales of shifty cum dodgers. These girls hate jizz like I hate the season finale of Dexter. [Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11 ]

Pizza Guy Goes For the Clit

Pizza Guy Goes For the Clit

It's all shits and tips until you get a 40-year-old Little Ceaser's employee a colossal erection. He was offered a peek, he went for the soggy box instead. Some label him a sexual predator - I prefer the moniker "pick up artist".

27,137 06.28.16 Anonymous Pizza
Girlfriend today, Wife tomorrow

Girlfriend today, Wife tomorrow

Esophogous mericlessly smashed at the hands of someone channeling their inner Nacho Vidal. Likely won't be able to eat solids for a week. No, this isn't my review of Holly Holm/Misha Tate. It's webster's officially definition of a 'mother fuckin KEEPER'.

125,413 06.25.16 DP
Dude Upstages Limp Dick Friend

Dude Upstages Limp Dick Friend

1 man does in 90 seconds what his wingman couldn't dream of with a cock ring and 2 handfuls of cocaine. Ferrari fast and lungs-deep. Check out 2:58. His look says "hurry up shit weasel, Game of Thrones is on in 5 min".

26,528 06.23.16 DP LULZ