It's kinda refreshing to know the cam-clam game has stayed relevant amongst the rise of OnlyFans popularity. Never forget the O.G. sex workers that paved the way via 56k modem bitrate and school libraries. Now let's go ahead and get these ladies under contract for the next Ghostbusters reboot. I smell Oscars.
You know you're in the golden age of porn when someone consults Michael Bay for their scene. Too bad the novelty of implied homicide wears off pretty quick when you have to multitask cumshots with Die Hard 1.
Turns out 67,000 incestuous storyline porn videos lied to us after all. Dare to make contact with your bloodline after the sun goes down in rural Alabama, and one of these clips just might be the Tales From the Crypt Halloween Special you walk in on.
Professional cuck-enabler Mariah Leonne takes a mouth-first dive into new territory; only to end up filming what may very well be the first "moment I changed teams" ever caught on video. For some strange reason, they broke up right after this.
College level alcoholism and risk seeking behavior has led them to a ratchet motel, wasted off vodka red bulls and making a quick $100 each. Shouldn't be any surprise that these girls never did porn again.
99.99% of men will never experience this man's life. He's got the negotiating skills of Elon Musk, the aura of a baconator and they've got no other options. It's a sexual combination you never knew you wanted until today.
One of those rare moments where I can overlook the obvious health code violations because the performance is legendary. Be sure to leave them a ★★★★★ Yelp review. Something along the lines of: Service was fast. Getting pubic lice was faster.
Consider this an open letter to the content creators out there: I will donate the $13.75 I made trading Krypto Kittys with down syndrome to a charity of your choosing, in exchange for promising to never use condiments on your wiener ever again. The balls are in your courts.
Overzealous producer does the unthinkable: Asks his lead actress to inhale a blob of her own mother's farm-fresh protein. But instead of saving a minisecule amount of self-respect for her own golden years, she chows down like the Amazon gift card they paid her with was worth it. #HUMILIATION
Symptom #293 you need to put an end to the all-turnip and MDMA diet: You develop the sex drive of a cinder block followed by the kind of speech impediment that could end a marriage in Alabama. But rather than seek Dr. Phil's help, you do this instead.
Giantess hand fetishes, assholes sponsored by Nickelodeon Gak and even a sneak preview of Street Fighter 6's in game graphics. This video has more diversity than a community college... but the shame. You can't graduate from that. [PART I]
