DO NOT TOUCH

DO NOT TOUCH

Uploaded 05/26/18
Related Videos

6 Amazing Sex Acts

Today's Menu: 1) Conor McGregor post-retirement 2) Ballin on a Budget 3) Hard Times Daddeh 4) The Mastadon Challenge 5) Contents Under Pressure 6) Always Get Your Moneys Worth

08/15/19 Fail

Butthole Rekt By Mandingo

Srsly tho, "dog fart" has to be the fucking worst studio name in porno history.

06/08/15 Dogfart Anal

Horrible Moments In Pornography I

Only 30% of these genetic anomalies come from Japan. The rest? Homegrown in the ole' U S of A. They could be your neighbors, your mailmen, even the friend you pay in Wendy's frosty coupons to perform the pittsburgh coal miner. Either way, they are among us.

02/06/25 Beef Curtains

Bad Boyfriends 2

Dude at the 2:00 mark must have went as Apocolypto for Halloween in 2006 and forgot to take the costume off, and I have no doubt our Scottish socialite's rectal contractions look like they just graduated a course in sign language. Go ahead and tell me nice guys actually do win again?

11/10/22 Crazy

2025 Had To Fucking GO

Another 12 months of spectating the human experiment take another detour to fuck town USA, aided by wrestling memes and movies you probably never heard of before. It was a fine society we had here once upon a time. But like buying a video card without qualifying for a loan first, those days are over.

12/29/25 LULZ

We've Completely Lost The Plot

Welcome to the "Donnie Darko" of porn.

03/08/18 Mildly Retarded

Porn That Shouldn't Exist: 8

30 seconds in and two things will become apparent: 1) You've been grossly mislead about Nebraska's tourism attractions. And 2) At least 50% of the people who seek these videos out individually, have ejaculated to the Nordstrom catalogue. Home decor section.

01/08/26 WTF

Porn That Shouldn't Exist: 9

So this is what happens when Chaturbate gets saturated with day-ones and you have to find creative ways to scalp juicer tokens. All because a rickshaw driver from Tanzania can't stop maxing out his data plan so he can tell azngirl8537 to "show anal and borbs".

02/19/26 Nasty

The Caught Compilation 25

It's almost like as time passes, society has less than a fuck to give about where they burn the midnight salami. Reminds me of the time I was almost caught defecating in a Blockbuster return box in protest to late fees accumulated on Surf Ninjas. [my balance remains due]

Anything To Bang An 18 Year Old

Her greed sickens me.

05/15/25 TripForFuck Virgins

I Can't Stop Fucking Strangers

Well shit, the only other time I've seen someone this determined to self-harm was browsing the /terraluna subreddit. And much like her inability to pass a gonorrhea test, I think it might be time to pack it up and find a safer hobby. Like collecting Pokemon cards, or building hydrogen bombs for example.

10/27/22 Public
Type ? for random video