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How Pornstars Get Pinkeye

The jizz of a black man infused with rectal juice? That's like fuckin battery acid. Kiss yo 20/20 vision goodbye bitch!

3,384,182 views 01/08/10 Fail

A Colonoscopy Before Anal

Chester's awfully eager to do some butt fuckin but fears his wanky might come out lookin like a Snickers bar [bitesize of course]. Luckily this Jap has access to cutting edge medical technology - a Feces Detector 3000. Kinda gross, but I find his dedication to 'safe sex' rather admirable.

4,930,293 views 01/01/10 Asians

Pocahontas Accidentally Shits Herself

An Indian prostitute that speaks in ebonics and lacks basic potty training? Some women are just born to be on eFukt.

2,767,845 views 12/23/09 Hookers

Scat Fail

He was promised a 2 pound turd. Instead he was given a Chicken McNugget. Those be grounds for a fuckin refund.

3,738,992 views 12/20/09 LULZ

The Headless Penis

What was once a sniper rifle is now a snubnose magnum. How'd that happen? Lemme guess... something involving farm animals and strategically placed peanut butter? It happens to the best of us.

2,724,433 views 12/13/09 Bizarre

Babysitting Fail

I wish my parents had been as considerate in their choosing of a babysitter. For 7 years they stuck me with Ethiopian dyke that wore basketball attire exclusively. Nearly left me with an inverted penis.

5,520,922 views 12/03/09 LULZ

The Blob

He can brag about his 20 pound meat bag all he wants. If it doesn't get hard, then it's about as useful as a black hooker at a blood drive.

1,487,063 views 11/19/09 WTF

He'll Never Do Porn Again

Failure to achieve erection OR premature ejaculation. Those are the top 2 problems most men face when trying to perform on camera. It's usually one or the other... but in this chumps case - 2 birds are killed with 1 very tiny stone.

3,145,166 views 11/17/09 Premature

Anal Creampie From Hell

It's crazy. On the outside, assholes all look the same. But if your rectum was to ever head south & emerge as a pink-sock... you'd quickly find that much like the butt plugs in Oprah Winfrey's sextoy collection, they come in all shapes, sizes and colors. 4 years of running a porn site and that's about all I've learned.

1,852,102 views 11/11/09 Prolapse

Bitch! You Broke My Dick!

Fuck porn, she belongs in MMA.

3,763,901 views 11/04/09 Fights

Mr. Plow

for when Colon Cleanse just isn't enough..

2,228,572 views 11/03/09 Insertions

The Inside Out Girl

Her asshole resembles the neck of a kid that's just been decapitated. Hmmm. Sounds like fap time if you ask me.

2,143,383 views 10/30/09 Prolapse

Suicide By Dildo

Don't give up.... you're almost there.

3,311,105 views 10/27/09 Insertions

BEEP BEEP! I've Got A Boner

Beating off at home is for pussies. Real men take their meat to the street.

1,178,100 views 10/25/09 Exhibition

Quit Fapping & GTFO

I guess he figured that once she laid eyes on his 7 inch yankee doodle, she wouldn't be able to resist and that a 'happy ending' would ensue. The Motel 6 guy actually shared the same ideology. Too much late night Cinemax porn can really fuck with your head these days.

3,543,688 views 10/09/09 Exhibition

The Most Miserable Pornstar Ever

Pretty sure I once saw this chick in a humanitarian commercial for Yugoslavian orphans. It's hard to forget a facial expression like that.... especially after fappin to it for 3 consecutive months.

2,256,010 views 10/07/09 Fail

The Elevator

I decided to reuse the sound bite from yesterday's clip. Who would've thought Robert Deniro's voice could so perfectly complete a video of a man retracting his nut sack to and fro? I know I know, it's amazing.

1,133,981 views 09/30/09 LULZ

Cunt Head

Yoshinoya lost his Rolex diamond watch up a hooker's fallopian tubes and sets off on a death defying expedition to recover it. Enjoy!

2,476,599 views 09/30/09 Asians

Healthy Alternatives To Anal Sex

She rather suck off a fuckin golden retriever than take it up the butt. No joke. They even have an in depth conversation about dog cock just prior to the cumshot finale. Nothing like a little steamy dialogue to keep your noodle hard, right?

3,886,772 views 09/22/09 Meatholes Painal

Titty Destruction

If you're among the minority of men that don't enjoy seeing Japanese women being beaten to tears, it's probably best you skip this one. These fun bags take more abuse than a Mexican pinata on May 5th.

2,272,102 views 09/21/09 Asians
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