Many, many years ago, in the days of old known as 1997, an instructional VHS was forged. Watch and learn how to master the art of one handed typing with post-aspergers Winnie Cooper from the "Wonder Years".
More insanity from the porno-terrorists known as the Japanese. Screen caps and shitty clips of this have floated around the net for years but I finally got a full HD copy.
There was a Russian potter, that had a Russian daughter, that one day fucked a man and told him about her father. The Russian man, who was a Fan, was never more proud of his daughter.
To find a man truly worthy of this title we must dig deep into the early days of internet pornography. A time when potato quality was top notch and only took 2 hours to download.
Meet Kim, the bombshell Azn who can't hear shit. Our genius porn hero guy figures to write down "me want fukky fukky" on paper and away we go. She only makes little soft vowel noises, it's pretty adorable.
I think this could be the downtrodden, meth-addicted little brother of the Reading Rainbow guy. They call him Black Salami and he's going to show us things.
Only so many things could explain such a bizarre video. I assume the lead male or the director was on drugs, but most likely everyone on set had to be on something.
"Fuck me in the ass based god", reluctantly said the state puff marshmallow woman, as he thrusted his black penis deeper into her gooey marsh-mallowy hole.
Watch these little engines that just fucking couldn't get a new hold on reality as God tier pornstars turn their sexual fantasies into humiliating nightmares.
The amazing thing? Multiple people thought these were good ideas and put a whole lot of effort into them. I.E. the guy who had to cut a dick hole in a giant Wheaties box or the man controlling the giant octopus dildo tentacles.
What weighs 95 pounds, likes the look of cock, and gets messy at the Arizona glory hole? Yeah, that chick. Personally she annoys me to death, but some of you fukr's can't get enough.
Yeah sure, looks neat now... but wait for the follow up video in a year when the labia is hanging like two flappy pancakes with weird scar-holes looking like some shit outta Hellraiser.
Some women that happen to look like rejected "Lord of the Rings" characters find themselves in a cheap hotel room, making a porn movie so atrocious that even the producer wouldn't show up to film it.
Shy Hungarian eighteen year old with a love for sadistic anal meets up with Rocco. Everything goes pretty fucking good until she pulls off a Hadouken in over-sharing.
For a hooker/pornstar, she honestly seems like one of the nicest people ever. Even if her butthole looks like the queen alien from "Starship Troopers" and possibly carries multiple strains of the same venereal diseases.
Turns out the 1987 original was supposed to be even more violent. With the new remake getting a PG-13 rating, with it comes the almost certainty to destroy the ultra-violent badass awesomeness of RoboCop and change him into a safe for kids metal pussy. Source: Ourrobocopremake.com
