Once again we're honoring the best of the worst in the world of webcam modeling. Where cute crazy bitches and really weird dudes are willing to stab at their own kidneys for our amusement and tokens.
Another year has come and gone, so let's not forget to pay a much deserved tribute to the hardworking women of the porn industry. This one's for you, ladies.
What weighs 325 pounds, has hair worse than Phil Spector, and secretly enjoys getting karate-kicked in the appendix while ripping ass? This chick's 798th fuck buddy, and he's not even the worst of the bunch.
KEY POINTS: she has not and will not fuck - (gypsy's orders), crotch shots are strictly prohibited and vibrators... well, those are as foreign to her as a condom in a Botswana whorehouse. Filmed by the legendary pioneer of gonzo porn - Ed Powers.
CHAIN REACTION: she gives a shitty blowjob > he retaliates by ejaculating in her mouth, (big no-no) > unexpected putrid jizz causes her to gag uncontrollably > heavy coughing puts pressure on already loose anus > splat, a Hershey Kiss is born. Similar video HERE.
Junkie reminisces about her previous employer - some motherfucker that literally blew a $100,000 inheritance entirely on prostitutes hired for nothing more than to eat Taco Bell and defecate on his face. In other words.. dude's a legend.
Pornstar demonstrates her multitasking proskillz by calling up mommy and holding a conversation as she chows down on a can of man-ass. Divided attention really ain't all that bad.
Male pornstar goes where no male pornstar has gone before: to the bathroom... whilst getting his dick sucked. Sounded like a wet one too. Guess this ends the century-long debate that blumpkins are merely an object of fucked up folklore. Another score for modern civilization.
A car full of Canadian hooligans armed with a VHS camcorder stumble upon a lady of the night that likes to show off the brown eye. Honestly... for someone that hasn't wiped their ass since 1993, her cornhole surprisingly didn't look all that bad.
Every time her son's cock gets brought up, her eyes widen like someone in the drive-thru at Taco Bell. It's pretty creepy. Almost as creepy as that basketball-sized tumor hanging from her mid section. Seriously, what the fuck is that?
Easy solution: grab the phone & shove it up her twat. With that hole being occupied, you'll have no choice but to relocate your penis to the nearest available orifice - her anus. I call this "How To Get Anal From A Prostitute Without Paying Extra, by eFukt.com".
I should probably visit Bosnia. If girls will drop their panties for dirty old scumbags like that over there, I might still have a shot at losing my virginity afterall.
If all the prostitutes in America turned political, crack would be legalized and sold through vending machines. It's best we keep their faces stuffed with cock.
There is a new threat out there to hookers worldwide. It isn't HIV or the police, it's a dirty old man named Douglas who has made an art form out of verbally degrading prostitutes lol.
