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Anal With Constipated Girlfriend

I'm always one step ahead of female biology. When I wanna ass fuck a woman, I simply lace her Cinnamon Toast Crunch with ex-lax. Come night fall, her cornhole is as empty as Tara Reid's head. Works every time.

09/09/09 LULZ

The Sex Life Of A Dwarf

Repost? Technically yes. But the addition of Beetlejuice getting titty-blasted by some random bitch makes it well worth a second viewing. I promise.

07/25/09 Mildly Retarded

Assisted Entry

I spy anal residue.

06/01/09

When Senior Citizens Attack

Had me ROFL'ing up until the point that he started bashing her face in like Mike Tyson. That was my cue to bust out the Jergens.

05/22/09 Vintage

Cleanup On Orifice Number 1

This is a fetish known as 'cuckold cleanup'. Usually it involves a closet homosexual who gets off on pimpin his wife out to random strangers. Often the husband will sit in the corner and actually videotape as his significant other gets pounded by foreign cock. Once the creampie has been injected, it's like 'all you can eat' night at Red Lobster. Yum yum eat em up.

02/21/09 Cuckold

Unwanted Product Placement

That's bad. Really bad. Pepsi should sue.

01/25/09

Your Cock Will Never Be That Big

Luckily I'll never be exposed to such humiliation at the hands of a woman, for in my hometown of Tajikistan it's a criminal offense to mock a man's penis size, punishable by decapitation via serrated butter knife. But that's not to say a woman would ever have any reason to shame my kidney cracker to begin with. Trust me, I put horses to shame.

01/16/09 Amateur

Oops, My Pussy Farted

It's only blooper if it involves a prolapse or someone unwantedly getting poo on their wang. That's the eFukt standard, you all know that. But for this, I just had to make an exception.

12/29/08 Kink.com Fail

Pornstar Nearly Impales Herself

Mullet girl doesn't seem to realize that a dildo this large is likely to cause internal bleeding. Had it actually penetrated her vagina - she'd go down in medical history as the first gynecology patient to have no need for a speculum.

12/17/08 Insertions

LOL I Made You Gag

He seems pretty happy about his achievement. Try doing the same thing again except next time stick your cock in her ass first. When she comes up to blow you she won't gag, she'll just puke. It's called "ass 2 mouth". I invented it.

12/14/08 Fail

BOOM! Your Ass Is Busted!

What happens when you put a huge cock and a tiny asshole together and shake it up a whole bunch? Prolapsicus maximus, that's what. I never finished med school but it's my professional suggestion that she pick up a pack of band-aids on the way home.

12/12/08 Fail

Amputee Porn Gone Bad

All the things that made amputee porn so great just got shitted on by whoever made this so called 'erotic film'. Amputee porn is about disabled, submissive (and usually defenseless) women being fucked by men with exceedingly large penises. I refuse to have it any other way.

12/10/08 Amputee

The Orgasm Of Death

Honestly, less than 1% of the shit I post actually makes me LOL. Anal prolapses and horse porn bloopers just don't seem to do it for me anymore. But man... the second I heard this guy blow ass in the opening sequence I LOL'd so hard my eyes started watering like an emo listening to Dashboard Confessional.

12/06/08 Orgasms

Maniac Attacks 2 Lesbian Sisters

This is from the 1976 classic Water Power. It's a lot like Taxi Driver, except this Travis Bickle has a little fetish for forcing woman into doing enemas at gun point. The film is actually based on real crimes committed by an Illinois man dubbed the "Enema Bandit". Anyway he's dead now, so R.I.P you scat-loving motherfucker.

11/22/08 Vintage

You Fucked My Pussy Up

It's not your typical work-related injury, but these things do happen... especially when someone is intentionally thrusting their foot into your vagina. It could've been worse - a flesh wound via jagged toenail... that would've put her out of work for good.

10/26/08 Fail

The Creampie

Nothing says revenge like like mixing bodily fluids into the foods of others. Think about how much spit, piss, shit and semen you've unwittingly ingested at the hands of motherfuckers like this. Processed food 4 life.

10/13/08 Bizarre

Good Porn Ruined By Shitty Music

It's a porno, not a damn fitness video. Stop adding in the shitty keyboard-generated dance music.

10/06/08 LULZ

He Can Suck His Own Dick

You think you've got it good? This dude has a curled mullet and a 7 inch cock that he can suck all on his own. Jealous right? Now before you do that semi backwards somersault, you should really read up on the dangers associated with autofellatio. Wouldn't want you to snap your neck or get some terrible STD.

09/28/08 Bizarre

Dying Orgasm

Just close your eyes and listen to the audio. Only time I've heard a man make sounds like that was in Al-Qaeda beheading video. See more from this awesome couple here: 1, 2 and 3.

09/10/08 Orgasms

Long Like The Neck Of An Ostrich

I have dreams of my penis being that big. I see myself wearing loose fitted short shorts with my wang hanging out the side as I rollerblade by the beach. Jealous men shield their girlfriends eyes as my cock sways back and forth in the wind.

09/08/08 Big Dicks
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