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Sniffing Her Butt Wont Help

Premature ejaculation is funny. People trying to combat premature ejaculation is funnier. Notable examples: A) pipe squeezer and B) focusing on dog shit. Today we introduce a new, equally fucking retarded method for countering early evac. It's called sniffin your costars asshole. And unless the bitch just shit out 4 baconators, it wont work.

05/16/11 Premature

Lesbian Porn Gone Bad

Kylie Ireland flips the fuck out after champaign-laced saliva (uh-huh) breaches her meat cave and causes discomfort. With 15+ years experience in the industry... you could likely slip a Mini Cooper up her twat without her even noticing... and yet somehow a single loogie results in a tapout? Looks like menopause came 20 years early.

Bukkake Fail

Everyone has a breaking point. Hers is 104 consecutive cumshots to the dome. Spill that much seed and she'll rage-quit your shoot and slam the fuck out of your doors like nobody's business. Some people just cant handle their calories.

Pulsating Pussy

Asian chick gets the elasticity fucked out of her, generating one pussy-throbbing orgasm after another. I have to say, the end result isnt too aesthetically pleasing. After the 5th orgasm her twat starts to look like something off an Arby's value menu.

12/08/10 Orgasms

Endless Orgasm Causes Brain Damage

Using some sort of futuristic device stolen off the set of Stargate SG-1, this woman's clitoris is vibrated into an orgasmic oblivion. Imagine if the lead characters of both The Exorcist and I Am Sam were delicately molded into one - this woman is what you'd get.

Umm... Where's The Condom

This dude is smooth. Real smooth. His technique? Purchasing oversized condoms (Magnums baby) and intentionally letting em slip off during intercourse. As soon as she notices he deploys a familiar line: "your pussy's just too tight". Uh huh.

LOL GTFO Grandma

This is rather odd. I mean the dude gets caught pissing on the face of his 20 year old girlfriend by a lady older than the first black and white TV and doesn't even bother to cover up. For a solid 10 seconds the old hag just stands there eyeing his cock. There's no embarrassment. No dialogue. Just one baffled senior citizen trying to make sense of a contemporary sex act.

05/29/10 Busted!

Super Mom

This is ex-pornstar Tiffany Million. She exited the adult industry in 1994 to become a Bounty Hunter in Arizona, which was later turned into a reality TV show. Unlike most of the 2 bit sloots in the business, Tiffany actually has some personality. She's funny as fuck and has an upbeat attitude to match, which makes beating off to her videos all the more rewarding.

05/17/10 LULZ

Lesbian Fail

Ashley Blue gets tossed to the ground after flaunting her diseased twat in the wrong girl's face. I'm afraid that canned tuna / Wisconsin aged cheddar aroma just ain't for everyone.

04/17/10 Squirt Bukkake Fail

Do Not Want

A car full of Canadian hooligans armed with a VHS camcorder stumble upon a lady of the night that likes to show off the brown eye. Honestly... for someone that hasn't wiped their ass since 1993, her cornhole surprisingly didn't look all that bad.

04/12/10 Nasty

Rectal Control Fail

She's in the middle of an all-girl bukkake shoot when her cornhole opens up and gives birth to a raisinette. Not only does this she pick it up and attempt to hide it, but she then continues to rub her snatch with the same fuckin hand. NICE 1 LADY!

03/30/10 Squirt Bukkake Fail

The Sherminator

Props to the ginger on his pipe laying skills. Honestly haven't heard a woman scream that loud since the time I was caught defecating in front of Blockbuster in protest to late fees accumulated on my rental of The Neverending Story 3 (director's cut). Good times.

11/20/09 Orgasms

Salad Tossing 101

HAHA what the fuck! Just listen to this guy. He lured in his enemy with a blowjob and then shanked him. Fucking new age ninja tactics.

09/17/09 LULZ

Big Penises Cause Big Problems

His cock is so big it's capable of causing fatal internal damage. I've never been so jealous in my life.

07/15/09 Fail

I Lost My Cellphone In Your Vagina

I have this strong feeling that she ended up passing out with that phone still lost within her vaginal abyss. Yes I can see the headlines now: "Promiscuous college girl awakens to the sound of a ringtone echoing throughout the canals. Surgical removal was necessary."

01/22/09 Insertions

Coworker Caught Jacking Off

Really now, I've been caught doing worse things on the job. K-Mart, January 2002, thirty minutes before closing, pet food aisle. Me, Mrs. Dilworth and a 2 foot lava lamp straight out of the display case. Use your imagination.

11/23/08 Busted!

Quite Possibly the Worst Stripper Ever

I like his Chuck Norris style somersault but I have mixed feelings about the use of chocolate syrup. Sure it'll easily mask the bitter taste of her cornhole but in the end how's he gonna be able to differienate syrup from shit? It's a dangerous game that salad tossing is.

11/10/08 Strippers

Butthole Damaged After Anal Sex

Here's yet another video of a woman suffering from bodily damage after granting a large cock permission to penetrate her brown eye. To be honest, I think this one is a tranny but that's besides the point. I want to know where those 2 giant raisins dangling from her asshole came from?

10/09/08 Anal

Bosnian Nympho Fucks In A Bar

I should probably visit Bosnia. If girls will drop their panties for dirty old scumbags like that over there, I might still have a shot at losing my virginity afterall.

07/11/08 Public
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