Only so many things could explain such a bizarre video. I assume the lead male or the director was on drugs, but most likely everyone on set had to be on something.
Flat-chested girls everywhere rejoice because there's worse things in life than having no tits. You could have weird tits and add implants, leaving you with gigantic weird sideshow tits. And back problems.
There's 3 things that simply no longer exist in my world: 1) pornography induced erections 2) positive feedback on my 'this is what a feminist looks like' tee and 3) dinners at P.F. Changs that do NOT result in 1st degree burns to my anus. This vid solved 2 outta 3.
I've always enjoyed the finer things in life, namely the Wendy's Cheddar Lover's Bacon cheeseburger, Cuba Gooding Jr. films and watching twats get used up like a Stretch Armstrong doll. Just watch.
Deleted scene from Un-Natural Sex 20 involving an ex-teacher looking to sacrifice the health of her colon in exchange for fame & fortune (aka $728 and maybe, just maybe, a Q&A with Swank magazine). Epic spoiler: things don't go as planned.
This video taught me two things. 1) eating Subway prior to apocalyptical throat fucking yields hilarious results and 2) CGI will not be necessary in any future Exorcist projectile vomiting scenes. Shananay's got it covered.
Director gets annoyed after discovering the star of his young/innocent themed porno flick is actually a post-crackwhorian guttertramp with a horrendous tattoo right where it counts. That's like casting Steven Segal in a drama about terminally ill lesbians. Some things you just cant pull off, no matter how big your ponytail is.
This is Mika Tan. She actually has a degree in biochemistry but passed on a relevant career to instead pursue the better things in life... like being anally destroyed while drifting in and out of consciousness. NICE.
First he bulldozes her ass till his cock turns brown. Then he moves up an orifice and gives her twat some chocolate-coated TLC... which is pretty much guaranteed to result in a wicked case of vaginitis but lets not spoil the fun. All things come to an end after he asks the most amazing question ever uttered in a pornographic film - "who wants lasagna?"
"You don't deserve my cock... you don't even deserve a bulldog's cock. All you deserve is your own stinking shit, so get down and suck it off my prick" .... turn the volume up for this one boys. Waaay up.
This is a fetish known as 'cuckold cleanup'. Usually it involves a closet homosexual who gets off on pimpin his wife out to random strangers. Often the husband will sit in the corner and actually videotape as his significant other gets pounded by foreign cock. Once the creampie has been injected, it's like 'all you can eat' night at Red Lobster. Yum yum eat em up.
All the things that made amputee porn so great just got shitted on by whoever made this so called 'erotic film'. Amputee porn is about disabled, submissive (and usually defenseless) women being fucked by men with exceedingly large penises. I refuse to have it any other way.
Really now, I've been caught doing worse things on the job. K-Mart, January 2002, thirty minutes before closing, pet food aisle. Me, Mrs. Dilworth and a 2 foot lava lamp straight out of the display case. Use your imagination.
It's not your typical work-related injury, but these things do happen... especially when someone is intentionally thrusting their foot into your vagina. It could've been worse - a flesh wound via jagged toenail... that would've put her out of work for good.
