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Go Away Bro, I'm Masturbating

This is why I carry a 12oz bottle of my mace in my center console. Rest stops are great for quick 'on the road' jackoff sessions but they're almost always laden with dirty old men looking to score free peep shows. If they want to see me make love to myself, they gotta pay... otherwise it's mace to the face.

10/19/08 Busted!

Black Cock Causes Bodily Damage

Not quite a prolapse but it might as well be. Her asshole looks a slice of damaged grapefruit and her vagina... hmmm... I'm gonna go with a cut of ahi tuna - burnt on the edges, raw in the center. Updating this site always makes me hungry.

09/20/08 Asians

Drunken Slut Has Hilarious Disaster

First off, this chick is drunk off her ass, and I mean that in a literal sense. She had a gallon of wine.. directly through her asshole. Now I always thought it was fun to poo on the floors of public restrooms, but this lady takes it to an all new level. If you've ever played Command & Conquer, think of her anus as the Ion Cannon.

09/18/08 LULZ

Pissed Off Crackwhore

She's coked out and on the rag. If that isn't an invitation for AIDS I don't know what is. Luckily this skank got kicked off the set before anyone had a chance to stick their dick in festering pussy hole.

Hooker Refuses To Get Off Her Phone

Easy solution: grab the phone & shove it up her twat. With that hole being occupied, you'll have no choice but to relocate your penis to the nearest available orifice - her anus. I call this "How To Get Anal From A Prostitute Without Paying Extra, by eFukt.com".

07/21/08 Amateur

Pornstar Attacks Male Performer

Eventually one of these girls is just gonna end up biting someones dick off during a throat fuck session. Trust me, I'll be the first to post it.

07/18/08 Meatholes Fights

Pathetic Guy Begs Wife For Sex

WOOPS! Correction: pathetic guy begs wife for permission to jack off while filming her nasty asshole... and even at that she is still reluctant. Buddy, you're better off doing what I do - stroke it to yourself in the mirror.

06/14/08 LULZ

How To Eat Pussy

Fuck, I remember downloading this video off of Napster back in 1999. It taught me the pussy eating skills that I have today and is directly responsible for dozens of sexually satisfied BBW's worldwide.

05/06/08 Orgasms

Orgasm Morphs Woman Into Beast

That man is lucky to be alive. She damn near bit his head off. I'll bet you anything she's related to this lady.

04/22/08 Orgasms

Goth Girl Gets Pierced

Genital piercings score you big points in the goth community. So does sucking my cock. Now get a haircut and get to work.

04/15/08 Modifications

Mom Interrupts Fuck Session

Some parents that were supposed to be gone for the weekend came home early only to discover that their office is being used for an amateur porn shoot!

03/03/08 Amateur

Spring Break Slut Gets Angry

Look at her go, sucking every cock in sight! But when one of the boys grabs on her titties, she turns into a raging ginger whore. She wants to bite his cock off.

02/26/08 Public

Public Pissing Gone Wrong

There's this faggoty fetish for girls pissing in public. This geezer takes offense to the concept. Would've been funnier if she was shitting. Much funnier.

02/15/08 LULZ

Elephant Sex Rampage

I don't know whats more pathetic, the computer nerds that made this or the douche bags that jackoff to it.

01/28/08 Demonic 3D Bizarre

Assisted Entry 3

This time around the guy literally jacks himself off inside her asshole. Gotta love those sounds!

10/06/07 Amateur

Foot Long Weiner

It's so big he can suck himself off & fuck his own ass with it.

04/30/07 Big Dicks
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