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Accidental Cum Shot

Noob's first and final attempt at porn stardom lands him in a gang bang shoot. He doesn't care, he thinks he's ready for anything... but nothing can prepare you to be a premature ejaculator's innocent bystander. PEW PEW

2,764,241 views 03/04/16 LULZ

Cum Haters Anonymous 2

10 career-defining moments where the recipient acts like they got shot in the face with snake venom. #5 being my favorite of the bunch. It's not every day you discover a completely new dialect and find out what happened to the cast of Small Wonder at the same time.

3,634,232 views 08/19/15 Cum Haters

THE BUKKAKE HATE COMPILATION

[boo-kah-kee] [Noun] A sexual practice involving a large group of men masturbating on a single person. I sorted over 30 hours of beta's jacking off on gutter sluts to make this. Enjoy.

2,806,092 views 04/27/15 Cum Haters

Friendly Fire

Dude gets blasted with man chowder after standing in the line of fire like a dumb shit rookie. Even worse, most of the load landed right in his belly button. Gonna have a real fun time cleaning that one out buddy!

2,706,744 views 05/30/10 Fail

NO ME GUSTA JIZZUM!

I don't know what's funnier: the fact that a professional cocksmith accidentally blew his load in the middle of a lap dance or the chunky bitch's facial expression after getting blasted with man sauce. Both are most definitely Kodak moments.

2,948,289 views 05/16/10 Dancing Bear Strippers

The Most Miserable Pornstar Ever

Pretty sure I once saw this chick in a humanitarian commercial for Yugoslavian orphans. It's hard to forget a facial expression like that.... especially after fappin to it for 3 consecutive months.

2,233,985 views 10/07/09 Fail

Pornstar Hates Semen

No one said you had to like it baby. Just sit back, open wide and think about all the Baja Chalupas you'll be able to buy as soon as you're done. That's what gets me through the day.

1,505,429 views 08/17/09 Cum Haters

Blowjob Fail

It's semen, not battery acid. Embrace the saltiness and show some appreciation.

2,144,458 views 07/21/09 LULZ

Don't Cum On Me Motherfucker

I wonder what that must feel like... to defend yourself from a physical assault as you're in the middle of ejaculating. I'd sue the bitch - 50k in punitive damages for an orgasm ruined. No one fucks up my fap session and gets away with it for free.

2,486,432 views 05/08/09 Fail

LOL I Made You Gag

He seems pretty happy about his achievement. Try doing the same thing again except next time stick your cock in her ass first. When she comes up to blow you she won't gag, she'll just puke. It's called "ass 2 mouth". I invented it.

2,871,275 views 12/14/08 Fail

Deadly Bukkake

Death by semen? I'm not too sure what's going on here, but I think all those cum shots did her in!

2,900,354 views 05/09/07 Bizarre
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