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Salad Tossing 101

HAHA what the fuck! Just listen to this guy. He lured in his enemy with a blowjob and then shanked him. Fucking new age ninja tactics.

1,495,871 views 09/17/09 LULZ

Molested At Lunch Time

This is a scene from some stupid French porno called The Image. Stars that old bitch from 101 Dalmations as some sort of empowered cunt that likes to dominate. Kinda funny but not really my cup of tea. I was raised on the notion that degradation is a man's job.

1,798,970 views 09/16/09 Groped

Blowjob Fail

It's semen, not battery acid. Embrace the saltiness and show some appreciation.

2,157,570 views 07/21/09 LULZ

Shotgun Blast To The Vajayjay

All I can think about is the people who jack off to this shit. I envision a crowd of a thousand Japs in a dimly lit adult theater, simultaneously ejaculating just as the girl's vagina gets blown into oblivion by a point-blank blast from a 12 guage. Enthusiastic high fives, everywhere.

1,424,916 views 07/07/09 Bizarre

Orgasm Renders Wife Unconscious

Neat trick but I'm afraid I lack the penis for the job. No worries though, that's where the GHB comes into play. It's all about equal opportunity fellas.

3,077,604 views 05/13/09 Orgasms

Ouch! My Cock!

Looks like women aren't the only ones to suffer injuries on the sets of porno shoots. Professional taco stuffers have a few occupational hazards of their own. I suppose that as long rectal prolapses aren't on that list, being a stunt cock is still my dream job.

1,767,513 views 02/04/09 Kink.com Fail

2 Inch Penis

Nice trim job! It almost looks half an inch bigger shaved.

834,531 views 01/03/09

LOL I Made You Gag

He seems pretty happy about his achievement. Try doing the same thing again except next time stick your cock in her ass first. When she comes up to blow you she won't gag, she'll just puke. It's called "ass 2 mouth". I invented it.

2,885,676 views 12/14/08 Fail

He's Not Exactly Pornstar Material

I love how he franctically jacks off even after he's already blown his load, maybe hoping to milk out one last squirt of man-goo and actually land it on her face? No such luck for this fatty arbuckle. I'll tell you though, I'm definitely diggin his torn up thong.

2,120,370 views 12/13/08 LULZ

The Orgasm Of Death

Honestly, less than 1% of the shit I post actually makes me LOL. Anal prolapses and horse porn bloopers just don't seem to do it for me anymore. But jesus... the second I heard this guy blow ass in the opening sequence I LOL'd so hard my eyes started watering like an emo kid listening to Dashboard Confessional.

2,493,337 views 12/06/08 Orgasms

Boob Job Overkill

Wanna see something cool? Give me a needle.

873,149 views 11/25/08

Coworker Caught Jacking Off

Really now, I've been caught doing worse things on the job. K-Mart, January 2002, thirty minutes before closing, pet food aisle. Me, Mrs. Dilworth and a 2 foot lava lamp straight out of the display case. Use your imagination.

2,217,130 views 11/23/08 Busted!

His Dick Wasn't Big Enough

When your penis just can't get the job done, you gotta resort to other body parts. The fist is the limb of choice for most of those big-pussied sluts, but of course there's always gonna be some with even more demanding needs. In this video the guy uses his foot, but keep in mind you can always skull fuck them too. Just shave your head 1st for the sake of hygiene.

1,767,452 views 11/07/08 Insertions

I Wanna Be A Pornstar

A few tit jobs and a little lipo, and then BAM... her vagina will be generating 7 figures annually before you even know it. It'll also be generating a yellowish discharge, depending on the severity of the Herpes and Gonorrhea that she's bound to contract.

1,592,682 views 10/04/08 Modifications

Search Her Pussy For Contraband

I love how this is a real procedure. They do it before admitting woman into correction facilities. Imagine having that job, getting paid to raid pussies for contraband. Imagine all the treasures you could find.

1,721,776 views 09/17/08 Groped

Pornstar Ruins Her Boob Job

Silicone is gonna start leaking out her nipples and in 3 days she'll be back to an A cup. I think that makes this the cheapest breast reduction surgery ever.

1,484,798 views 08/19/08 Fail

Brutal Injury While Making Love

I'd say she was about due for a nose job anyhow.

2,451,659 views 05/22/08 Fail

Free Blowjobs At Rap Concert

I'm afraid it would take a lot more than a free blowjob to get me to sit through that shitty ass concert. I'm talkin ass 2 mouth at the very least.

2,251,024 views 05/02/08 Public

Girls Should Never Go To This Club

I wonder how much these male dancers make. Getting paid to strip girls naked sounds like the job I was born for.

3,275,393 views 04/17/08 Groped

The Troubles Of Making Porn

Apparently getting your dick hard for a hot pornstar isn't as easy as you'd think. I'd probably blow my load before even getting my cock out of my pants.

1,637,064 views 04/16/08 Fail
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