Passion of the Painal

Incredible Acts, Depraved Humans 7

These stories have not been embellished, because - they need no embellishment. They are simply, horrifyingly, the story of the average degenerate human sharing space on this planet with you. Except that last one...It'd be more believable to call that woman a scientist, because the elements she's finding in there are undiscovered by man and Bill Nye.

Dad! I Don't Want To Fuck You!

Those crazy porn directors have made a full movie featuring the entire systematic sexual conditioning of ones daughter into a fuck buddy. All in magnificent POV. Disturbing? Sure. But is it fappable?

2023 Was Out of Fucking Control

As we head towards the final sunset of a year that gave more than one reason to disembowel our own eyeballs with a stinger missile, it's time we reflected. May 2024 bestow upon us more trolls, deeper holes and Twitch.com finishing it's metamorphosis into Chaturbate.

"You deserved it"

Much like Cardi B's popularity, one has to question why this even exists in and how we got here in the first place. Emphasis on the Oscar-award winning method acting seen in the opening dialogue. Simply brilliant.

How To Fail in Porn [x2+]

A hilarious short story about the prettiest ogre girl from the little village of Mordor... She was looking for her big break but instead she was left with only $250, a butt load of pain and a mouth full of grossness. Me gusta?

The Accidental Anal Compilation

Not much is worse (or funnier) than an unexpected penis bashing some hoer O-ring with little forewarning or lube. Ideally, zero forewarning and zero lubes.

Anally Destroying a Mentally Disturbed Teenager

This whole glorious scene is a beautiful train wreck and I can't fucking wait to hear a epic drum and bass remix of this. EDIT: [Remix #1] [Remix #2]

10 WTF Momentz in Pornography

Twice as many as five porn scenes that leave you with more questions than answers and more confusion than boners.

The Purge

She seems like a nice girl. The type that would throw herself off a post office rooftop if you missed her text, or fuck the mailman's chihuahua if your Instagram pic got 0 likes. But her taste in recreational activities? Shit, I've seen happier faces cleaning toilets at the Renaissance Fair.

18 Year Old Suffers O-Ring Blowout

Don't worry, in a few days she'll be sitting and shitting normally. Just gotta put some icy-hot on her hurt butt and eat a lot of fiber. No worries.

THAT DIDN'T END WELL

Prostitute Lasts Only 28 Seconds

Technically she lasted closer to 10, but this guy isn't very fluent in "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO", so that mahogany-stained browneye got pounded for a few more Missippi's than desired. Emphasis on mahogany-stained .