A happily married couple is currently pushing the boundaries of amateur porn. They're both jizz fanatics that mix their love of semen with public escapades. I wish I had a friend with a wife like this.
If you thought we were going to make it through 3 volumes of woman decorating their reproductive systems with everything that isn't bolted down at Home Goods, and not get a single appearance by the only pornstar that could land a Dyson sponsorship; you thought wrong. And quite frankly, I'm a little disappointed. Also RIP Rowdy Piper.
Welcome to the far east, a place where vaginas are never shaved but always multi purpose. A place where a nice business man can get a sake and light a cigar off a strippers vagina. Fun times.
Luna Bella. Maybe you've already heard of her? She's no Alexis Ren. But what she's lacking in personality, genetics and decency, she makes up for in... well, nothing actually. Her tits look like they were bolted on by a blind intern at Lego Land, and I don't know whether to run or rim.
The lore actually goes deeper than you could have ever imagined. It's not about the volume of anonymous vagabond cocks. It's not about the money. It's about sending a [fucking] message.
Internet webcam hooker Bella Alice appears to suffer from acute reflex seizures triggered by sexual climax. She also uses a sound activated dildo that vibrates when people tip her which is funny af.
Bittersweet painal, obscenity-filled orgasms, and a boob job predating the bicentennial. This ones got it all, and Ms. Big Ole Leathery Funbags earns some serious bonus points at the 2:35 mark.. Not even a fuckin rectal injury can dull her desire for ATM.
Outside of ejaculating to Nicolas Cage's death scene in The Wicker Man, no male celebrity will bring you remorse quite like Simon 'Dirt Nasty' Rex. Former MTV VJ, rolls with Andy Milonakis... and 20 years ago he took a $100 payday to stick his dick in Zack Morris' bedroom carpet. [Diss Track by Traplord Skybaby]
Yeah uh... so is this what studio porn has evolved into? Because if I've lived to the point where people are actually spending money on producing cleverly disguised Cialis commercials we may have finally reached the bottom...
