Sexual Fatalities From Japanese Cartoons

Take one part anime, one part pornography, one part Mortal Kombat and you end up with a hilarious show about ninja school girls sexually man-slaughtering perverted villains around campus.

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You know you're in the golden age of porn when someone consults Michael Bay for their scene. Too bad the novelty of implied homicide wears off pretty quick when you have to multitask cumshots with Die Hard 1.

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The Skank Tank

Psychotically perverted Japanese porno directors have constructed a gigantic fish tank made for sexually tormenting cute teenagers.

Raw Leftovers

For my Japanese-deficient friends, the original title of this masterpiece roughly translates to: "Nana Maeno Refrigerator Girl I Put My Step Sister In The Refrigerator And Turned Her Into A Frozen Sex Toy Nana" Do I believe more than 3% of those words? No. But honesty never got in between me and my cum sock before, and it isn't about to start now.

BiG Bertha's Pocket Rocket

The name "Big Bertha" comes from a giant Pre-Nazi German war cannon that would lob 1,800 lb explosive shells into shit like France and Belgium. It also happens to look like this bitches dick.

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The Man With Two Dicks

Being born with a deformity is horrible, until you consider the possibility of having two big fully functioning cocks. In that case, it's winning the genetic lottery and gaining super human sexual abilities at birth. Finally a hero the internet deserves. Read more here.

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TED 3: A Japanese Porn Parody

The long awaited return of America's favorite talking bear. Join Ted in Japan on one of his wackiest adventures yet as he's found himself in the care of a teenage school girl and Ted's going for the Nanking special.

Imagine Doing this During a Pandemic

3 years into a viral outbreak and Aiko literally can't curb her addiction to Chili Dogs & Chill. Judging by the video footage, this is both an ethics violation and a crash course on why you diligently vet those profiles on japanesebrides.com.

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Covid-100

If there's one thing that never fails to flat-line a hardon - It's how far Japan is willing to go gate keep the title of Commander of Repulsive Sex Acts. So here's one that won't be getting beat any time this decade. Reddit gags, I laugh, You bookmark.

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How to Make a Girl From Okinawa Cum

Is it even possible to bring an oriental female to orgasm without the help of Bob Vila's signature series at this point? I don't know what evolutionary timeline they're living in over there, I can promise you this road only leads to an addiction to Newport cigarettes and a whole lot of apologies.

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36 Inches, No Fears

If you think that number is talking about hog dimensions, you will be sorely mistaken. It seems this attraction has stricter height limitations than Six Flag's El Toro. You gotta measure less than 4 feet tall, well-versed in THOTology and be next in line for a fight with Jake Paul. Brutal. Part 1 [HERE] Part 2 [HERE] Support [HERE]

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Asian vs. Airsoft

Some wisdom I picked up during my 2 hour stakeout of a monster truck rally bathroom: You get what you pay for. And by the looks of those potato-sized welts taking up residence next to her shithole, I'd say this dude used Groupon at the time of service.

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