Slap That Dick

Slap That Dick

Uploaded 08/06/14
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CAMTASTROPHES #13

Every day, everywhere you look people are spamming fears of USD collapse and political discourse. While I'm over here waiting for things like this to start happening in Chipotle parking lots during daytime hours again. #boomer #oldfashioned

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The Creepiest Motherfucker in Porn

If there's a book out there on what NOT to do during intercourse, I'd say this dude just paved the way for a fucking trilogy. Nevermind his Rosie O'Donnell-like figure, or his unsettling fetish for floppy disks. The real prize is at the 2.48 mark. Ladies and gentleman, this motherfucker just single-handedly brought back Planking.

05/15/13 White Ghetto LULZ

Banned From Arby's 4 Lyfe

After popping a molly (or 5) and getting fucked with a lawn chair, this girl realizes her dreams of being on worldstar are within grasp and totally goes for it. IMHO not worth the lifetime of shame without curly fries and roast beef.

10/23/15 Amateur

Degens Are Everywhere

Here it is: Martin Scorsese of Japanese what are you doing step-bro? porn. My thoughts? Guillermo del Toro and his production company have some catching up to do. I don't know wtf I just watched but personally, I think he should find a way to cast the Olsen twins in the sequel and let the tapioca fly.

03/10/21 JAVHD Asians

Real Casting Couch

Of all the ways to "tELL mE uR fRoM nEw jErSeY wiThOuT tELLinG mE uR fRoM nEw jErsEy" this actually ranks #2 on the list. Our duo is still 1 deep fried oreo enema away from the gold medal. Shoot for the stars.

Sexy Triple Amputee Needs Money

She can't finger or fist herself but this hot little monopod is making some extra cash nubbing at her vagina for tokens. FAP FAP FAP

Fent Demon Takes Over House

Our boy is having domicile problems of the synthetic drug variety, and it's fucking up his after-work Roblox clan war. The charges? Breaking and entering, aggravated harassment, disorderly conduct and skidmarking Target's finest bedroom linen. Tensions rise, police are called, I laugh. Pretty funny shit.

03/09/23 Crazy

11 of the Craziest Orgasms Ever

All I'm trying to say is the G-spot is easier to find than you think.

100-Man Gangbang Doesn't End well

Nevermind the fact that she talks like a slightly upgraded version of Stan's sister. What I really want to know is where this current trend of bodily fluids being used as a sole protein source started from. And I want to know now.

It Actually Makes Her Cum

Any female that signs up for a Woodman scene more than likely has an undiagnosed neurodevelopmental disorder. And she is no different. A handful of WWE finishing moves has her pastrami butterfly goopafied and no other man will satisfy her again. #gg

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