Slap That Dick

Slap That Dick

Uploaded 08/06/14
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11 Seconds: That's the average time it takes for one family-sized order of Chang's Orange Chicken to kick flip it's way out of my body and make it's way back to the manure farm. It's also the amount of time it takes the new poster girl for "LOLIDGAF" to get the official Efukt seal of approval. You're welcome.

05/26/19 Anal

The Most Talented Homeless Girl in London

Local vagrant takes us on a journey that blurs the line between southern cooking and female independence, as illustrated by a sex act that's led to more infections than a Marilyn Manson concert. Never before has adult entertainment made me prouder of my KFC rewards points.

01/16/23 WTF

Now You're Crippled

First-timer foolishly assumes her debut appearance is going to be a walk in the park. Emphases on the word walk, because it looks like all her future tours of Italy at Olive Garden are going to be wheelchair accessible from this point forward. What in the fuck...

CAMTASTROPHES #17

If anything at all, you should be digging the distance some people will go just for the sake of being different. That's what porn is really missing: A relatable leading actress that's been kicked out of a WWE catering truck. Twice.

08/19/25 CAMTASTROPHES

Awkward Asian Fellates 10 Dicks

I've never seen someone so happy to get gang banged in the mouth...

10/09/16 HardX Asians

18 Year Old Backseating

Promiscuous girls make the porn world go round. So let's see what happens when the brave lad at "faketaxi" finds himself in a precarious predicament.

09/26/19 Teen

Just Japanese Things

An all-minority female cast ultimately leading to me losing faith in life itself? You can go ahead and file this under The 2016 Ghostbusters Reboot of Porn. And Bill Murray can't save you this time.

02/29/20 JAVHD Asians

The Dumbest Cunt In Porn

How does one earn such a title? First, be Serenity Haze. Then sign up for porn.

Safe Sex FAIL

Gloryhole rookie "Emma" unequivocally accepts defeat after Stewart's Magnum XL ventures into deeper waters. In other words: The flex went wrong HAHA

The Caught Compilation 6

Flipping the Minnow, Clubbing the Chimp, Procrastabating, Shaking Hands with Bruce Willis - Call it what you want. I refer to it as the only reason to leave the house other than to stock up on Mr. Pibb and fried dough. Shoutouts to feminism for empowering these women.

Awkward Moments In Porn 2

"Fuck me in the ass" reluctantly said the state puff marshmallow woman, as he thrusted his black penis deeper into her gooey marshmallowy hole.

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